Through Painted Deserts

Taking a Tumble.

2010-01-11T15:20:00.000-08:00

To my beautiful, loyal readers: I've relocated to Tumblr. I'd love to have your input on my new blog. Thanks in advance for your continued readership!

On Inaction.

2009-11-09T19:33:00.000-08:00

:: Purity of mind and idleness are incompatible. ::

Ghandi

The Sunrise Project.

2009-10-29T18:50:00.000-07:00

I love YouTube. Because of this simple site, I've fallen in love with online personalities like Debra (of Jackie and Debra), Dave Barnes, Judy Grimes, and Hitman Breaker of the Eye. Their performances are hilarious, wild, insane, and, frankly, genius.

But there's one online video that's really struck a chord with me. It was produced by my friend, JJ Starr, who is a senior at Pepperdine University. He's an aspiring videographer and, if you ask me, he's already made his mark as a documentary filmmaker. He spent the month of October filming the sunrise from different vantage points in Malibu. What he and his roommate learned throughout the filming process was so profound to me. I won't over-analyze what they taught me; instead, I think that you should check it out yourself.

(As an aside, I'd like to share the photo below as a reminder of how brilliant Shea Miller is for dressing up as our favorite YouTube character, Debra, for Halloween last year. If only I could relive that night...)

God's Thoughts on Addictive Personalities.

2009-10-29T17:38:00.000-07:00

Today's topic was a difficult one to face. The question Libby posed was, "What is the last thing God showed you about yourself?" That's hard, isn't it? God's always showing us things about ourselves, and most of the time (in my case, anyway), they aren't necessarily lovely things. Sure, He reminds me on a daily basis that I'm worthy of His grace, that I'm loved by amazing people, and that I'm created in His image. But as far as my actual character goes, I feel like God usually is looking down at me, smiling shyly and laughing to Himself, thinking, "C'mon, Rach. You're almost there, but not quite."

So I digress and make the following point: God teaches me a lot of things. I don't always recognize them until it's too late. That would be the case regarding the most recent lesson I've learned. Usually I consider this a blessing but sometimes, like right now, I view it as a curse: I love people. I could probably be with people all the time if that were acceptable. I have an addictive personality, and I don't hesitate at packing my schedule full of playdates with friends. I've even been known to move into friends' homes without asking permission first because I love spending time with people too much (see the previous post re: 21228 Pacific Coast Highway).

As I said, I typically view this appreciation of others as an asset. However, I've noticed the toll this particularly "addiction" (if you will) is taking on me since I've moved to Dallas. I didn't really know anyone when I moved here. I've been spending my time reconnecting with former classmates at Pepperdine or meeting with friends of friends. I've loved the adventures I've had while I've met new people. I've consumed too much fried food at the Texas State Fair, jammed to U2 at the new Cowboys stadium, reveled in the bliss of Mambo Taxis from Mi Cocina, danced to wedding tunes in the small town of Sherman, cheered on the Cowboys (though secretly rooting for the Bears) while nursing a beer, and sipped on vanilla chai at hole-in-the-wall cafes throughout the city. The point is, I've been busy. And while that's largely due to the fact that I love people, it's also related to the fact that I am afraid of being alone. And now, on this Thursday night, I find myself absolutely exhausted, both physically and emotionally.

I'm not afraid of an empty apartment, or of the dark. Instead, I guess it's that I'm anxious when I don't have plans or commitments. I think it's because society teaches us that busyness is equivalent to success or worth. Add that to my love for people and it's not so surprising that I have distaste for being alone. I think the other component that factors in is that it's much easier to spend time alone when you know that have a community of friends than when you're unsure of whether or not that's true. Don't get me wrong--the friends I've met here are amazing. But I've only been in Dallas for six weeks, and it's obvious that my best friends still all live in California. I feel the need to make plans so that I can eventually establish the community I'm seeking in Dallas that is just like the one I had in Los Angeles (and San Francisco and San Diego).

What God is teaching me, though, is that I must find my worth, my value, and my peace in Him. While He has blessed me with amazing people who demonstrate His love for me on a daily basis, He's asking me to be content with him, trusting that the community I desire will fall into place according to His timing.

Tonight I decided to take a break from my whirlwind schedule. I got a manicure and pedicure, took a hot shower, made a spinach pizza, drank white wine, and enjoyed the newest episodes of "The Office." And for the first time in awhile, I felt relaxed and at peace. Here alone in my loft with nothing on the agenda, just hanging out, me and God. And Michael Scott.

21228 Pacific Coast Highway and Don Ivanko's Only Triumph.

2009-10-27T08:18:00.000-07:00

I take way too many pictures. That's a relatively well-known fact. I always carry two cameras with me: a Nikon D60 for shooting the important stuff of life, and a Canon PowerShot for recording video and sneaking into "photo-free" zones. In fact, in my iPhoto I currently have 17,549 pictures (the enormity of that number just registered with me, and frankly, even I feel overwhelmed by its sheer size).

So trying to choose my favorite photo out of all of those options is nearly impossible. There is one picture, though, that strikes me as an all-time favorite. It's the image above, which captures one of the best adventures I've ever had in Southern California. Brody Smith, Dave Kob, Erin Macdonald, Mac Smith, and I decided to spend an entire Sunday sailing from Marina del Rey to Malibu and back. It was an impromptu event planned, literally, the day before the trip took place. We spent the day basking in the sunshine, toasting champagne, grilling great food, having dance parties, deflecting the attention of our crazy captain, Don, and illegally swimming in the ocean after we'd been instructed not to. It was perfect. And in the midst of the insanity, Don snagged my camera and captured this photo, which is now framed on the wall that I've dubbed my "hall of fame" in my apartment in Dallas. Don failed us in a lot of hilarious ways on our sailing trip; fortunately, capturing the joy evident in this photo was not amongst his shortcomings.

This picture is important to me for reasons beyond the bliss of that day spent sailing around the Pacific Ocean with fabulous friends. It signifies the integration of a beautifully, randomly connected group of people. Just one month prior to our sailing adventure, Erin, Dave, Mac, Brody, and I did not regularly pencil each other in to our schedules. In fact, half of us were in L.A. while the other half lived in Texas. I'd like to take the time to thank 21228 Pacific Coast Highway for bringing us together.

Mac and Brody, who are a pair of brothers that I befriended while at Pepperdine, were taking a hiatus from their Texan lives by spending the summer in Malibu. Generously, they lent me a key to their beach house while they vacationed in Florida with their family for 10 days. They also gave a copy of the key to Dave, one of Mac's fraternity brothers. Coincidentally, Dave and I met during my freshman year of college, when we spent the majority of our Intro to Journalism class making fun of each other. We hadn't reconnected in years and here we were: Roommates. I knew that Dave and I were destined to forge a new, fantastic friendship when I awoke to him jumping on my bed one morning, shrieking, "Get upppp, it's time for work!"

Fast forward three days: Erin comes back from a trip to Napa Valley and promptly moves in. At the same time, Mom was visiting and she took Erin (who was already her second daughter) and Dave (who became her second son) under her wing. The four of us (in addition to Nick Mason and Chris Jones, who are amongst Mom's other favorites) spent the weekend together and had a blast. We became family.

And then the Smiths returned. To their surprise, they learned that the three of us would not, in fact, be moving out. Can you blame us? We were living in the most picturesque home in all of Malibu with some of the greatest people this country's ever known--and trust me, neither of these claims are exaggerations.

If it's not evident through the words I've written in this post, I'll spit out my confession point blank: I fell in love with this group of friends in a way I never thought possible. We come from different backgrounds, friend groups, career paths, and geographic areas. And yet, the thing I continuously craved was time with this special group of people. I believe that it was our differences that bonded us together. Erin's passion for adventure reminded us to enjoy each and every day as the gift that it is. Mac's generosity taught us to be thankful that we have much, and to reciprocate by giving to those who have little. Dave's brilliant sense of humor encouraged us to laugh constantly, even if sometimes it means taking a break from this serious world to laugh at yourself. Brody's sweet spirit allowed us to contemplate the concept of stepping back from it all to drink in the beauty that constantly surrounded us. And we all believed in the therapeutic powers of an impromptu dance session, which served as a reminder to never forget to celebrate the little things. It was so much fun to watch our adventures unfold, knowing that while the summer would eventually end and that our lives would take us in different directions, we would forever share the bonds of 21228, Don Ivanko, and our friendship.

Reflecting on Inflating Inner-Tubes, Writing Poetry, and Hiking Hills.

2009-10-21T07:38:00.001-07:00

Adventure #1: Spend Saturday biking around Santa Ynez wine country? Sure, why not.

My darling friend, Libby Senna, and I have engaged in a blog challenge. We picked seven random topics and must write about all of them within a two-week period. It doesn't matter which days we write, necessarily; rather, we just have to get the posts done. It's supposed to be a lesson in accountability and conditioning. I hope that the challenge forces me to practice writing on a consistent basis, and that it encourages me to continue writing after we're through.

The first topic revolves around the issue of choosing a favorite quote. I think Libby and I both agree that selecting one phrase and titling it "favorite" would be impossible. Instead of trying to pick one thought, I'll choose a sentiment that I've been reflecting on recently.

I just finished Donald Miller's new book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. The book review will come in a separate post (whenever I get back to THAT blog idea...hopefully this challenge will also serve to inspire me to continue reviewing literature) since I don't have the time to write about it now, nor have I been able to accurately assess how I feel about the piece in its entirety. Regardless of my thoughts about the story as a whole, there were some passages that really jumped out at me because of how strongly they related to my current stage of life.

The book is about storytelling, and about how we are essentially responsible for creating our own stories. God gives us the tools to make our own decisions and though He knows the outcome of our choices, He offers us the opportunity to live our best life, should we be up to the challenge. The following quote from Miller's book really stood out to me for the way it encourages readers to embark upon adventurous, life-changing journies:

We have to get up off the couch and turn the television off, we have to blow up the inner-tubes and head to the river. We have to write the poem and deliver it in person. We have to pull the car off the road and hike to the top of the hill. We have to put on our suits, we have to dance at weddings.

This is something that I have found to be so true, and I'm thankful that Miller's words reminded me of this sentiment. I'd like to believe that I have an adventurous spirit, which I'll attribute to my friendship with Erin Macdonald. When I came to Pepperdine as a freshman in 2004, Erin and I cemented the foundation of a friendship that will only continue to flourish and grow. Though we were raised in Wheaton together (and made many hilarious memories growing up), it was at Pepperdine that we became as close as we are today. So much of that is due to the way Erin's outgoing and thrill-seeking personality affected me and shaped my character. She taught me the importance of walking through every figurative (and sometimes literal) open door, whether that's achieved by accepting an invitation to attend a barbecue on the beach or it's just the decision to dive into the ocean, fully-clothed, after a good run. Since then, I've always attempted to invest in the opportunities presented to me, as large or small as they may seem. Weekend trips, semesters abroad, living situations, afternoons outdoors, and impromptu vacations have all been decided upon based on my inability to refuse to accept anything less than extreme. Sometimes that gets me in trouble; other times it allows me to continue walking (or sometimes sprinting) down the path that Christ has set before me.

This isn't to say that I'm great at being adventurous or outgoing; to be sure, I fail at achieving that goal on days when I just can't get myself together. The point is, as Miller's quote reminded me, a journey-seeking life is one that I should be attempting to live. God gave us the tools to write amazing stories. He's asking us to intertwine the concepts of mystery, suspense, adventure, comedy, faith, and (only sometimes) drama in order to structure a story so great that we praise the One who gave us the resources to live it.

As Miller pointed out, God is not a puppeteer who controls our every action. Instead, He patiently waits for us to discover the loveliness of life on our own, allowing us to stand in awe of what He has created. He quietly encourages us to take part in the moments worth remembering. Maybe that's done by choosing to live in a trailer park in Malibu, or by deciding to eat only frozen yogurt for lunch...or breakfast. Maybe that's accomplished by taking impromptu trips up to Point Dume to photograph the sunset, or by buying a flight to Denver to visit an old friend. Maybe that's achieved through watching a foreign film, or by sweating through a Bikram yoga class. However it's done, the goal is to explore the beauty that exists in everyday moments. In coffee. In sunrises. In loft apartments. In fried cookie dough. In service trips. Equally in the great as in the small. And the whole time, being cognizant (that's for you, John Joyce) of the Creator who made it all, reveling in the treasures set out before us solely so that we can reciprocate by offering praise to the One who loves us most.

Throughout this post, I've thrown in some photos from some of my favorite spontaneous adventures. Some are huge choices or events while other decisions or happenings may appear small. Yet they all comprise memories that are essential to my very being, components that have aligned themselves to create Rachel's story.

Adventure #2: Going to Ghana after meeting Pam Cope resulted in passion, purpose, and, ultimately, a career with Touch A Life.

Adventure #3: Lunching with Miss Erin Macdonald, the teacher herself. I mean, why not go to Malibu hot spot, Geoffrey's, for two meals in a row? The restaurant boasts the best view in town as well as the tastiest crab cakes on the coast.

Adventure #4: A Memorial Day Weekend to be remembered: San Jose del Cabo 2009. A trip that was once dreamed of eventually came to reality, thanks to everyone's desire to reunite from all around the country and seek out adventure.

Adventure #5: Redefining the lunch break at White Rock Lake Park in Dallas (my new hometown), camera in hand.

Adventure #6: New Year's Eve 2009 in Nashville with Carter. Such an impromptu decision turned into a weekend of good food, great dance moves, and the best time spent catching up with friends.

Forever on the Dance Floor.

2009-09-24T14:12:00.000-07:00

Celebrating the Spences in Napa Valley.

:: It's like I waited my whole life for this one night

It's gon' be me, you, and the dance floor. ::

-- Chris Brown

Brad Blakey is always the best date because he unabashedly loves to dance. He was my date to Pi Phi formal my senior year at Pepperdine and that was when I realized how much I appreciate it when people can dance anywhere, anytime. Besides the fact that I adore him, this was a huge factor in my decision to ask him to be my date to Karli and Nick's wedding in Napa Valley. Another good thing about Brad is that he doesn't seem to mind when I repeatedly want to get down to Chris Brown's, "Forever," my favorite dance party jam. And by repeatedly, I mean every day.

I would prefer to have dance parties on a daily basis, but because of jobs and other such limitations, I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll just have to wait for epic occasions like Kar and Nick's nuptials (although sometimes, I admit, I've been known to host impromptu dance parties in parking garages, friends' kitchens, and grocery stores). In those situations, I depend on a date like Brad to be just excited about the evening's dance party as I am. And he always lives up to the expectations I have for him. In fact, he usually surpasses them.

I've noticed that many people are uncomfortable with strutting their stuff on the dance floor, and this realization has allowed me to learn how much I appreciate those people who don't give a care in the world what others think about their moves. So here's to you, Mr. Blakey, for always being the perfect date, the perfect friend who will never fail me on the dance floor.

Also, I would like to have the acoustic version of "Forever" played as
my first dance at my own wedding someday.
Please, no one steal this idea.

Thanks be to Libby Senna.

2009-09-23T21:14:00.001-07:00

:: Considering life's brevity, we should travel abundantly, with great enthusiasm. ::

Peter Megargee Brown

The balcony of Chateau Smith in Malibu. Long live 21228.

So. I haven't updated my blog in TWO MONTHS. How does that happen? Complacency and busyness, I suppose. I had a few faithful blog followers mention something to me about how I hadn't written in awhile, and, because I appreciated that they read my blog, I promised to update its content soon. But I never did. It wasn't until a serious fire was lit underneath me by Elizabeth Senna. I met Libby through Katie Van Buskirk and, to be honest, our friendship has grown thanks to social media. I think it's safe to say that we keep tabs on each other through Facebook, Twitter, and our blogs. Except that she couldn't keep track of my blog because I wasn't writing anything. Which must have prompted her to send the following message via Twitter:

"RayJ, I religiously check your blog to see if you've updated and you NEVER DO. As a loyal reader, I'm begging you to update!"

I don't know if it was the capitalization, the use of one of my favorite nicknames (also fondly used by Jonathan Clark), or the compliment of securing her readership, but I was just thrown into writing/updating gear. Libby is an incredible writer, so her encouragement was just what I needed to get me back to blogging.

So why did I spend so much time away from my blog? I'd have to blame it on the travel. I am so blessed that I lead an insanely busy, beautiful life, full of exciting adventures that focus on the exploration of the world. Since I last updated in July, I've:

Lived in a beach house in Malibu (thanks to the Smith brothers, who kindly let Erin Macdonald, Dave Kob, and I move in)
Toasted to Karli and Nick's engagement at a couple's shower in Pleasanton, CA
Checked "see Coldplay live" off of my life's to-do list by attending their concert in San Diego with Becca
Gallivanted around Los Angeles, going to Dodgers games and sailing across the Pacific Ocean (maybe not quite across it, but definitely from Marina del Rey to Malibu)
Celebrated Karli's engagement (again) by having a bridal shower at the gorgeous, '70s/James Perse-inspired Ace Hotel in Palm Springs
Traveled home to Chicago for a Jantsen's Gift book party honoring Pam Cope and Aimee Molloy, while rounding out the weekend by enjoying Mike and Renata LaBelle's wedding
Gone to Ghana for two weeks to volunteer at the Children's Art Village, work with my incredible boss (Pam), and rescue 13 sweet children from Lake Volta
Been honored by the greatest group of friends when they threw a "moving-to-Dallas" surprise party for me in Malibu
Loved on Jonathan and Mallory Clark as they recited their vows, and reveled in another Commune-ist reunion
Paddle-boarded in the ocean off of La Costa beach in Malibu with Nick Mason, constituting one of my favorite adventures in Southern California
Spent Labor Day Weekend with Karli and her other bridesmaids, soaking up the sunshine, drinking Steve King margaritas, and enjoying the few weeks Karli had left as a single lady
Moved from Chateau Five Oh Nine, my sweet apartment in Santa Monica, and road-tripped to Dallas, Texas, where my new loft awaited me
Participated in the most beautiful wedding of all time in Napa Valley, also known as the union of Karli Megan and Nicholas Michael Spence

As you might imagine, this didn't leave much time for blogging. But after I read Libby's message, I started wondering why I didn't carve out the time to write. I guess part of it is due to the fact that I'm a people-person; given the option, I'd always rather spend time with loved ones than absorb the peace and quiet of an evening in. But pausing is so important. It allows us to give thanks for the amazing adventures in our lives, reminding us of the little details that compose our very beings and make them so much richer.

I will continue to travel, abundantly, and with great enthusiasm. But I will begin to document the details so that I can properly celebrate the little things. I'm talking about the little things that compose the bigger picture that is life. You know, the little things that, deconstructed, are the things that mean most to us when our confusion about life and love is at its height. Those little things that never cease to remind us of the blessings found in every crevice of life. And I will continue writing about them. I will continue blogging. Abundantly, and with great enthusiasm.

Spending Fourth of July on the beach with Becca.

Mike Miller and I could be soul mates, I think.

Mom visited Malibu and, of course, we had to take out one of her favorite friends (and mine): Nick Mason.

Karli and Nick's couples shower in Pleasanton.

I love that no matter what changes in our lives, we will always maintain the most beautiful, creepy friendship.

The Coldplay concert in San Diego. Perfection.

Family (Brody, Erin, Mac, and me) at the Dodgers game.

Sailing all over the Pacific Ocean. Our best adventure yet.

Karli's bridal shower at the Ace Hotel in Palm Springs.

There's not much better than a night of outdoor living rooms, not having to change out of your bathing suit, fabulous food, and the best friends.

We were obviously addicted to the photo booth at the hotel.

At the Jantsen's Gift book party in Chicago with Mom, Pam, and Aimee, three of the most influential women in my life.

High school girlfriends (Molly, Katie, Kelly, and I) re-unite for Mike's wedding.

Oh, how I love my brother and his return to the United States.

Back to Ghana, where I left my heart.

Momma with three of my favorite boys: Famous, Dodzi, and Moses. How lucky am I that my mom and I get to have these adventures together?

With Emmanuel and Joel. So beautiful.

Pam and I with our irreplaceable staff (George, Jr., George, and Kofi) on Lake Volta.

I have the best boss on the planet. No contest.

Sweet Joseph, waiting to get a check-up at the clinic in Kete-Krachi. One of the most difficult and important days of my life.

My best friend in the whole, wide world, who orchestrated the most fabulous surprise party.

I had NO idea. My friends are epic.

With my fabulous bests (by the way, yes, you can have more than one best friend; though it's a term I've used throughout this post, it doesn't diminish its meaning because the women who earn its title deserve it), Erin and Bec, at Jon and Mallory's wedding.

Commune-ists together again.

Floyd brought us some sweets before we hit the dance floor.

Nick took me paddle-boarding so I could check it off of my Malibu bucket list. We had the greatest afternoon.

Nicky, you are just too fantastic.

Gettin' it, with Chateau Smith in the background.

The most perfect Labor Day weekend spent at the most perfect lakehouse.

I just don't think I've ever laughed as hard as when Katie and I were tubing.

Chateau Five Oh Nine, you served me well.

I will always be able to call Santa Monica "home."

Roadtrip nation. Do it to it, Lars.

Somewhere in southwestern America. Let's say Arizona or New Mexico.

Dallas, Texas. Loft life begins.

My beautiful best got married!

With the bride and the maid of honor.

Bridesmaid-ing.

Bradshaw Blakey is always the best date.

Another fantastic reunion. We are good at this game.

Soaking up time in the vineyards. Napa Valley, I will be your resident someday.

The Uniform Project.

2009-07-13T08:50:00.001-07:00

I didn't realize that my 21-year-old brother was one to subscribe to blogs (other than anything found on ESPN, of course). I actually had no idea that he was even reading mine. So when he observed that I hadn't updated my posts lately, I realized that it was really time to get into gear and start updating my writing.

Good thing that there's something that I can't get off my mind--something about which I need to write, something about which the world needs to read: The Uniform Project. The Uniform Project is a topic that is perfect for blogging purposes. Karli Meg shared this Web site/cause with me while we were gallivanting around Pleasanton together this weekend and I can't stop thinking about it. Sheena Matheiken started The Uniform Project to perform, as she calls it on her Web site, "an exercise in sustainable fashion." For 365 days, she will wear the exact same dress. She has seven dresses, all of which are exactly the same, and she rocks a clean one each day of the week. To distinguish between outfits, Matheiken reinvents the dress by wearing accessories (think jewelry, handbags, tights, shoes, vests and hats) that have been handed down to her by supporters of the project. (Even you can be a supporter of the project by e-mailing Matheiken at theuniformproject09@gmail.com. Tell her you want to get involved and she'll respond, telling you how you can send accessories her way.)

In addition to donating accessories, participants can also donate to the project itself. The Uniform Project doubles as a campaign to raise awareness of and funds for the Akanksha Foundation, a grassroots organization that seeks to revolutionize the education system in India. A former student in India herself, Metheiken always had to wear a uniform to school. She and her peers found ways to individualize their style by adding accessories, therefore distinguishing their tastes from one another. The funds raised by the project will support the Akanksha Foundation's efforts to provide school uniforms and other educational expenses for children who live in the slums of India.

I think that part of the reason I love the Uniform Project so much is because it goes to show that there's no limit to the things you can do with a little innovation. Creativity and generosity are the catalysts in ensuring that change effectively takes place in the world.

This is to be My Symphony.

2009-06-26T10:15:00.001-07:00

Madrid, Spain.

I read this quote in a book my mom gave me called Things I Want My Daughters To Know. I got chills as I read the beautifully constructed phrases. Truly, this quote is a work of art and it is has indeed become my personal symphony.

To live content with small means;

To seek elegance rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion;

To be worthy, not respectable, and wealthy, not rich;

To study hard, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly;

To listen to stars and birds, to babes and sages, with open heart;

To bear all cheerfully, do all bravely, await occasions, hurry never.

In a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common.

This is to be my symphony.

:: William Henry Channing ::

Segovia, Spain.

Madrid, Spain.

Segovia, Spain.

Dancing in the Rain.

2009-06-19T09:08:00.000-07:00

Santa Monica.

:: Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass.

It's about dancing in the rain. ::

Oh, Mexico. The Sun's So Hot, I Forgot to Go Home.

2009-06-18T16:30:00.001-07:00

A photo montage of the most blissful Memorial Day Weekend spent on the beaches of Cabo San Lucas with 12 of the world's greatest...

The Funsaver underwater disposable camera. Maybe one of the best purchases I've ever made.

My heart.

Best friends since the Appalachian days.

Perfection.

Obviously, jumping off of the roof into the pool was a great idea.

Soul sisters.

Me and Christyn at the infamous El Squid Roe. Trying to be obnoxious vacationers; think we pulled it off?

The album cover.

Soulmates.

Spring break is for grown-ups.

Love me some Nick.

To be 21.

2009-06-18T16:21:00.000-07:00

In honor of Andrew's 21st birthday (which was on April 24), and as an apology for my tardiness...

This post pays homage to Andrew Joseph Johnson, the best brother in the whole wide world. And to a 21st birthday no one will forget...

"You would think it's M***'s 21st...It's M***'s birthday, too!"

Andrew Joseph

Will Ferrell + Kristen Wiig = Pure Genius.

2009-05-19T23:41:00.000-07:00

Brilliance.

Stewie, on Relationships:

2009-05-13T15:38:00.001-07:00

Brian and Stewie of the hit cartoon series, Family Guy.

Brian: So what happened?

Stewie: Well, you wanna know what I learned this week? Being a grown-up sucks. Women, Brian, what a royal pain in the ass. It's like, it's like, why can't you just hang out with guys, you know, just live with someone of your own sex, just do what you would do with women, but with your buddy? You know wha...why don't guys just do that?

Brian: They do. It's called being gay.

Stewie: Oh, that's what gay is? Oh, yeah, I could totally get into that.

Tall Nonfat Easy Ice Chai Tea Latte.

2009-05-12T23:16:00.000-07:00

For those familiar with the hilarity of complicated Starbucks orders, the "147xxxx" blog is for you. It is such a treat to read the well-crafted posts posted on this blog, all of which are written by an anonymous Starbucks barista. The author is talented, funny and witty, not to mention wise. Her anecdotes about Starbucks customers, coupled with her own insight on relevant topics, make her blog original, unique and a joy to read.

The Proverbial Mango Tree.

2009-05-12T23:10:00.000-07:00

Ghana, March 2009.

In Ghana, there's a tradition that the people use when acquainting themselves with each other. Friends and family will gather together under a mango tree when they meet newcomers in order to get to know one another. One person begins and explains where they have been and where they are going; everyone else follows suit.

While in Ghana in March, our team got to participate in this tradition, and it was so incredible to reflect on where we had all been and where we all saw the paths of our lives heading. Everyone had unique stories, backgrounds, goals and dreams to share.

In the busy, tiring and stressful moments of life, take time to pause and think about where you have been and where you want to go. Be thankful for the moments in the past that have shaped you, allowing you to move forward and achieve the goals that are set out before you.

Dorothy Got it Right.

2009-05-11T09:09:00.000-07:00

10 Muirfield Circle. The backyard. My favorite spot.

There's no place like home.

I am contentedly sitting inside my beautiful house in Wheaton, IL, contemplating how blessed I am to have a job that allows me to work from home, wherever my home might be on a given day (whether that's Santa Monica, Malibu, San Francisco, Dallas, Chicago or Ghana). It's so nice to be home. I haven't been here since Christmastime. Home is the only place where I can truly relax; having had the privilege of exploring Wheaton throughout my teenage years, there's not much left in this city that I feel like I need to do. Instead, I can just be.

While at home, I can:

Spend delicious amounts of time with Mom and Dad.
Watch endless episodes of House and America's Next Top Model.
Have Starbucks waiting for me on the breakfast counter in the morning.
Enjoy home-cooked meals.
Spend evenings drinking Blue Moon beer or red wine by the outdoor fireplace, one of my most favorite places in the world.
Have friends stop by to catch up while sitting by the aforementioned fireplace.
Order (and consume) too much pizza from Taylor Street.
TiVo my favorite shows, a luxury not afforded to me at my great apartment in Santa Monica.
Sleep. A lot. Maybe too much.
Take trips to Target, Nordstrom, Anthropologie and Barnes & Noble.
Get a manicure and a hair cut.
Read long-lost books that have been re-discovered on my bookshelves, in addition to Mom's back issues of People and Self.

Hang out on the floral couch in the family room for far too long and not feel bad about it for one minute.
Reminisce about the good 'ole days at Wheaton Warrenville South High School.
Know how blessed I am by evaluating where I've been and where I'm going.

Chicago in the fall. Sitting by the outdoor fireplace is amongst my favorite pastimes.

I Like Texas.

2009-05-06T20:53:00.000-07:00

Well, from Dalhart to Del Rio
And out El Paso way
I've been doin' fine on Houston time
When the sun sets on the Copano Bay
From way up where the Red River flows
On down to the Rio Grande
I was born a little native Texan kid
And I'm proud to say that I am

Yeah, well, I like Texas
Ain't it fine here
I like to pick my guitar down at 'ole Gruene Hall
And drink that Miller Lite beer
Yeah, well, I like Texas
Man, there ain't no doubt
Just listen to me 'cause I know what I'm talkin' about

Well, there's old dancehalls and little cafes
Where you can get a taste of the Lone Star state
You can strap on boots and have yourself a laugh or two
Well, there's no line dancing, just straight romancing
That Hill Country love is what I fancy
The streams running clear and the skies they are so blue

Yeah, well, I like Texas
Ain't it fine here
I like to pick my guitar down at 'ole Gruene Hall
And drink that Miller Lite beer
Yeah, well, I like Texas
Man, there ain't no doubt
Just listen to me 'cause I know what I'm talkin' about

Well, it's a two-day-old burrito
One lukewarm beer to go
On the Sunday side of a road trip weekend
And Lordy, I was feelin' so low
When somebody flipped on the jukebox, and I heard old Bob Wills say,
"Won't cha' stay all night, stay a little longer?"
So I held on another day.

Yeah, I like Texas.

Pat Green

The Reason for Journals.

2009-05-03T19:14:00.001-07:00

Dwight Schrute and Michael Scott, of NBC's The Office.

Michael: Why do you have a diary?

Dwight (whispers conspiratorially): To keep secrets from my computer!

The Malibu Lumber Yard.

2009-05-02T21:20:00.000-07:00

I am officially obsessed with the Malibu Lumber Yard. This area opened up recently in the Cross Creek Plaza. Originally, Cross Creek was a fantastic area that offered residents everything from numerous coffee shops (the small center provided patrons with the option of getting their daily caffeine fix from either Starbucks or Coffee Bean) and great hole-in-the-wall restaurants (places like the Mexican-themed Casa Escobar, the Italian-flavored Tra Di Noi and the one and only John's Garden, a delectable salad and sandwich spot) to clothing stores and celebrity hotspots, like Nobu, a popular and pricey sushi establishment.

Due to the neat state of the economy, shops were closing on a regular basis. The pet store, which was home to many Pepperdine students who filled the void of being unable to have dogs in their dorm rooms by playing with puppies on the store's grounds, shut down. Casa Escobar closed. Ben and Jerry's ceased to exist. The movie theater was at risk, and rumors spread that Marmalade, a chain restaurant that serves the best breakfast in town, was about to see its time in Malibu come to an end as well.

In the midst of this economic turmoil, something was brewing on the grounds of the former Malibu Lumber Yard. When I was a freshman at Pepperdine in 2004, the lumber yard was in full swing. It was essentially a huge hardware store where patrons could purchase building supplies and home improvement gadgets. It went out of business long before any of the present economic problems arose. The space had remained occupied by the lumber yard building itself but it was void of employees, products and shoppers.

The Malibu Lumber Yard project had been planned since the fall of 2007, yet it was uncertain as to what stores would fill the spaces being constructed on the premises. Because the inner courtyard was obstructed by the lumber yard's original walls, residents went about their daily business, unconcerned and undisturbed by what might be occupying the storefronts come 2009.

The grand opening for the space was held recently but I only stumbled upon this treasure trove yesterday. I guess I had no expectations for what the space might hold but I was blown away. The architecture and design are fabulous. The space is constructed using dark red and brown wood, remaining true to the lumber yard feel. Tall, oblong fish tanks filled with tropical plants and creatures are placed strategically throughout the space like statutes. Luscious-looking cream chaises line the porch in front of James Perse, an upscale clothing store.

The lumber yard aesthetic of the actual space perfectly complements the types of stores occupying the shops. JCrew is tucked into the corner and its interior is whitewashed and given a beachy feel, while Tory Burch is in the middle and its walls are screaming with neon colors. Theory, next to Tory Burch, has a toned-down storefront and practices minimalism, as the store itself almost looks like a warehouse. Crumbs is a delicious cupcake bakery across the way from Tory Burch and JCrew; not only does it offer delectable treats and tasty coffee beverages but it's sophisticated in its decorations as well.

Fittingly, there are many random yet perfect touches to the lumber yard. There is a Ping-Pong table available for patrons's use, located outside of James Perse, next to a row of beach cruisers. D'Amore's Pizza owners decided to send their delivery truck to post up outside of Crumbs, offering residents the opportunity to grab a slice of cheese or pepperoni before exploring the shops. Tables litter the deck, providing customers with the perfect place to sit and take in the scene.

Even the name itself is so great. Not only is the label an ode to the former space but it's such a tribute to the simplicity that encapsulates the personality of Malibu. Truly, the Malibu Lumber Yard is the town's gem. Hurry over and check it out yourself.

Commencement.

2009-05-01T12:50:00.001-07:00

I know, I know. I graduated a year ago and therefore have almost no right to still be pondering the topic twelve months after the event itself. Except that I do because today, as I sat working at Coffee Bean (loving their lattes and free wireless internet) in Malibu, watching families scurry around town in preparation for the graduation ceremony that will take place at Pepperdine tomorrow, the other term used in place of graduation dawned on me: Commencement.

COMMENCEMENT.

Root word of commencement: commence.

In the online version of Merriam-Webster's Dictionary, the definition of commence is twofold:

1) To have or make a beginning.
2) To take a degree at a university.

The way that these two entirely different definitions intertwine is so beautiful to me. One year ago, commencement only signified an end to me. An end to a beautiful four years spent at the most perfect college in the country, and probably the world (hey, I'm allowed to be biased in my own blog), an end to living with the best friends I'll ever know, an end to enjoying the Malibu coast on a daily basis, an end to impromptu frozen yogurt and Lily's burritos runs, an end to an era at 28300 Rey de Copas Lane...an end. It was an end and only an end.

In retrospect, it is so obvious to me that commencement, at its core, signified a beginning. No wonder it's listed first in the definitions in the dictionary; at its root, commencement is first and foremost a fresh start, a new perspective, a bright adventure.

The photos on this post illustrate the journey I embarked upon after commencement. Initially, I was a graduate, an emotional wreck who didn't desire change but felt at peace with the experiences that undoubtedly were in store in the future. Six months later, after numerous attempts at finding the right career, I landed the most fitting job with the Touch A Life Foun dation, and was blessed with the opportunity to travel the world, love on the beautiful children pictured above, use my talents and pursue my passions. One year after graduation, as depicted in the third picture, I found balance, peace and pure, unadulterated happiness. I found me.

I don't doubt that former Roman military and political leader Julius Caesar knew what he was talking about when he said, "Veni, vidi, vici" (later translated to "I came, I saw, I conquered"). But, no offense, big guy, I think I found my own version of that statement:

I COMMENCED.
I saw.
I conquered.

Memoirs of a Part-Time Reader.

2009-05-01T09:51:00.001-07:00

I hope to have a library this extensive someday.

Well, happy May. (P.S. How is that possible, that it's May already?) Here's a shameless plug for the new blog I started a few days ago. I adore reading (maybe more than should be legally possible or socially acceptable) and wanted to start something where I could document my thoughts and critiques of the material I've read. I hope that whether you love reading or not, you can find something about the blog that you enjoy, or you can find a piece on the page that teaches you something new. Read on, members of the blogosphere. I know I will.

Today in 2008: Remembering 28300.

2009-04-28T00:08:00.001-07:00

Kim, Karli, Natalie and I moving out of the Malibu Villas. April 28, 2008.

I need to start this blog post by admitting that I shamelessly stole this topic idea from Becca Marie Patterson. Thanks for being creative, Bec.

That being said, I was thinking about where I was a year ago today. I had spent the entire Monday after graduation from Pepperdine (April 26, 2008) moving out of the beautiful villa I shared with three amazing women in Malibu. Karli, Kim, Natalie and I lived in our sweet two-story home during our junior and senior years in college. So many good, hard, amazing, difficult and beautiful things transpired under the roof of our quaint residence. We truly shaped one another's character during our years as upperclassmen. We emerged from the experience as stronger women, as closer friends.

Fast forward a year. It is insane how much has changed. The four of us, alongside the rest of our friends and classmates, were introduced to so many new things: new hometowns, new residences, new roommates, new relationships. We got jobs, some of which were incredible, others of which served to shape us for just a period of time while simultaneously preparing us for something bigger. Some of us got engaged; others of us endured heartache. Some of us traveled the world; others of us explored our new neighborhoods in Southern and Northern California. We all laughed, cried, reunited and reminisced.

Nothing could ever replace the memories made at 28300 Rey de Copas Lane. Nothing. But I know I can speak for Kar, Kim and Nat when I say that I know that despite the things we'll miss about our pretty villa, we're so excited for what's in store for us within the next 12 months, and for years to come.

These girls mean the world to me. I owe them so much for shaping who I have become. Long live 28300.

Eventually.

2009-04-27T10:55:00.000-07:00

I was cleaning out my room and two pieces of paper fell out of an old journal. It seems that during my senior year at Pepperdine, I had created a bucket list of sorts. It looked something like this...

Eventually, I hope to...

Work for a magazine.

Live in a new city.

Take a hot air balloon ride.

Do mission work in Africa.

Teach exercise classes.

Visit Thailand and Costa Rica.

Take a photography class.

Rebuild New Orleans.

Take on a crazy entrepreneurial challenge, like opening a bookstore/coffeeshop.

Run another marathon.

Vacation in Italy.

Write a book--who cares if no one reads it?

Start and maintain a prayer journal.

Paint something.

Work/volunteer for St. Jude even after college.

Finally learn to play the guitar.

Work as an event planner, either for non-profits or corporate organizations.

Read the Bible cover to cover.

I love that I found this list. It's so interesting to see what I envisioned myself doing a year ago. I've accomplished some of these things, lost interest in a few of these things and am still pursuing the rest of these things.

It's a great reminder of all the incredible opportunities that life has to offer, and of all of the things my little collegiate self thought were possible to achieve. I think it's easy to, once you enter the real world, forget all of those dreams you once had. It's not hard to become disillusioned, believing that goals you desired to accomplish are way too far out of reach. They're not, though. Keep dreaming.

St. Augustine.

2009-04-08T14:20:00.000-07:00

All anxiety is caused by the

COLLAPSE

of a false idol.

St. Augustine

Or Any Other Reason.

2009-04-01T19:28:00.001-07:00

:: It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking:

the arrival of a friend,

one's present or future thirst,

the excellence of the wine,

...

or any other reason. ::

Latin Proverb

Then I Did.

2009-03-31T01:34:00.000-07:00

saying you've been waiting all your life for a break like this

it's a chance of a lifetime

you just know it is

you gotta go find those dreams

was the last thing that you said

and then i did

but you were wrong

love was what i wanted all along.

i thought about calling you when i got off the plane

every time i see this city through the clouds, i get that way

but you were wrong

love was what i wanted all along.

rascal flatts.

Waiting.

2009-03-27T00:33:00.001-07:00

:: I am sure God keeps no one waiting unless He sees that it is good for him to wait. ::

C.S. Lewis

Strawberry Swing.

2009-03-27T00:12:00.000-07:00

Enduring (and actually enjoying) the 10-hour drive from Lake Volta to Tema with Rachael Wise and sweet, sweet Moses.

I was in Ghana last week. I went for work and we had the most incredible trip. (Check out the Touch A Life blog for day-by-day recaps of our adventures while we were there.) While we were there, we were blessed with the opportunity to rescue the most amazing 12-year-old boy. Moses was supposed to released from his slave master on Lake Volta in September but, due to a series of miscommunications (including an instance regarding the slave master and his family's mysterious disappearance, in which they took Moses and the rest of their trafficked children to an uncharted island), we were unable to place him in one of our Touch A Life programs until last week.

Moses was frightened when we saved him. Despite the abuse he's faced while working on Lake Volta as a trafficked child for the past four years, he cried when he left his island. I suppose that's because life on the lake is all he knows. Within minutes, though, Moses sensed that the people who were taking him away from the island were trustworthy, and the hugest grin spread across his face as he boarded the boat that would take him home. His life will never be the same.

There were two instances in which I thought God must have been smiling down on Moses. The first was when I was sitting on the front porch of the Village of Life (one of our programs that provides vocational training for 14 to 18-year-olds we've rescued off of the lake) reading a book while the sun set. I sensed a presence behind me and, lo and behold, sweet Moses was shyly standing there. I gestured for him to come sit on my lap (he doesn't speak English yet, so we communicated mostly through hand motions) and he obliged. I set down my book and gazed into the hazy, purply horizon. As Moses happily snacked on a Tootsie Roll pop, I thanked God for that moment. "Surely," I thought, "this is what heaven must be like."

The second moment when I tasted a glimpse of the Kingdom was on our drive from the lake back to Accra/Tema. The drive is, to put it lightly, heinous. It is ten and a half hours of pure torture. I am not exaggerating when I say that the drive is traumatizing. On our way up to the lake, our driver was being so crazy that our vehicle demolished two goats crossing the street. Seriously, we pancaked a little baby and destroyed the hind legs of its mom. Too much information? I can't say I feel sorry for you since I was the one who actually saw it...

I digress. All of that was to say that I was not looking forward to the return trip to Tema. But an added bonus to this drive was that Moses was with us. He sat next to me on the ride home and thought it was hilarious when we'd fly over bumps during our five hour trek on dirt roads. He was giggling, playing with our cameras and grinning like a crazy man. It was beautiful. The best moment, though, was when, as he sat next to me, he flung his arms around my waist, cuddled his head into my chest and fell asleep. Moses had finally reached a level of comfortability with me that allowed him to feel safe, an emotion I'm sure he rarely experienced on the lake. Just as sweet Moses was drifting off, Coldplay came on my iPod. And nothing could have encapsulated that beautiful moment better than the lyrics that played at that very instant:

:: They were sitting

They were sitting

In the strawberry swing

Every moment was so precious

They were sitting

They were talking

In the strawberry swing

Everybody was for fighting

Wouldn't want to waste a thing

Cold, cold water

Bring me round

Now my feet

Won't touch the ground

Cold, cold water

What ya say?

It's such

It's such a perfect day

It's such a perfect day ::

Classifieds: Santa Monica Resident Seeks Position in Venice Drum Circle or Graffiti Gang.

2009-03-26T23:50:00.001-07:00

Once upon a time, this man, while cruising around Venice on his Rollerblades, sang me a song called, "Mysterious Angel." It was lovely, really.

Venice, CA, is one of my favorite places in the country. Venice shares a border with Santa Monica and while the two cities are separated by nothing more than an imaginary, government-created line, the cultures of the two towns couldn't be more different. Santa Monica seems to cater to the lives of young professionals while Venice is the place that hippies, yogis and vegans call home.

Despite the fact that I love living in Santa Monica and that I've found much that I can relate to in my neighborhood on Colorado Avenue, there is something about Venice that is irreplaceable. I always end up taking visitors there; I think it would be a travesty for anyone to miss out on this one-of-a-kind town. Take the Venetian local in the above photo, for instance. He was hilarious, entertaining and quirky. And though I met him probably four or five years ago (when he serenaded me with his smash hit, "Mysterious Angel"), I never forgot him. The same goes for the muscular guy who wears a Speedo and yellow cat-eye contact lenses while he cruises the streets lining the beach. Or the kids lounging on the side of the street market, waving signs that proclaim that they "will work 4 weed."

I think the thing that I appreciate most about Venice is that, as weird as the community is there, the people are so refreshingly real. The Rollerblading musician? Doesn't care what Hollywood (or anyone with ears, really) claims the definition of "music" should be. The weight-lifting Speedo-clad man? Clearly has no worries regarding body image. The languid potheads? Just honestly want weed, and aren't going to pretend that they're something they're not.

A few weeks ago, I went for a run along the beach in Venice and I found myself deciding to walk through the street market on my way back to observe the people there. It was in that moment that I found myself to be the most down-to-earth I'd been in awhile. I felt as though I was truly a part of humanity, a part of a community that protects the idea of being true to who you are, a part of a town that cherishes individuality. Are there some (legally) insane people in Venice? Absolutely. But I'd take the honest, soul-baring, true-to-themselves crazies over anyone else any day.

One day I'll join a graffiti gang or a drum circle in Venice.

The Power of Love.

2009-03-06T14:43:00.000-08:00

:: When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace. ::

Jimi Hendrix

Ghana's Independence Day.

2009-03-06T14:35:00.001-08:00

I poached this post from an entry I made on the Touch A Life blog. But I couldn't really help myself because ever since I wrote this post, I haven't been able to stop thinking about the paradox of Ghana's Independence Day.

Today is Independence Day in Ghana. On March 6, 1957, the people of Ghana celebrated the end of colonial rule in their country. Many workers in Ghana have been given the day off to recognize and honor this important date.

This holiday, comparable to the American celebration of the Fourth of July, is exciting and noteworthy. But it is also a reminder that though the country is free of outside rule, independence and freedom are not exercised by all. Hundreds of children are still enslaved on Lake Volta, and they need our help to enjoy the independence that the rest of the Ghanaian citizens are celebrating on this very day.

Where in the World is Rachel Johnson.

2009-02-27T15:06:00.001-08:00

Sometimes I feel like I'm in a perpetual state of traveling. I often times believe that I don't have an address; rather, my suitcase/airplane/hotel/boss's house/friend's place is my home. In 2009, I have already traveled to:

Nashville, TN
Los Angeles, CA
Dallas, TX (three times)
Big Bear, CA
Tucson, AZ
Pleasanton, CA
San Francisco, CA
Lake Tulloch, CA

And I have plans to go to:

Gomoa-Fetteh and Lake Volta, Ghana
New York, NY
Back to San Francisco, CA
Cabo San Lucas, Mexico
Newport Beach, CA
Madrid, Spain

Sometimes, when I get tired of flying or sick due to germs caught on a plane or annoyed because of incompetent travelers surrounding me, I pause and take a moment to remember how incredibly blessed I am to zoom around to all of these exciting places, especially during this time of economic crisis. I love being busy; I never want to sit still. I'm always planning my next trip, and I live for weekend getaways.

So catch me if you can.

Valentine's Day.

2009-02-12T17:38:00.000-08:00

But really. I actually love Valentine's Day, whether or not I'm in a relationship, because it reminds me of how blessed I am to love and be loved by so many amazing people. I want to take time to let some of the amazing people in my life know why I love them:

Mom

Because I can tell you any and everything, and because you are my best friend.

Daddy

Because you are my voice of reason, and because you love me more than I deserve.

Andy Joe

Because your sense of humor brings balance into my life, and because you are always there to support me.

Pam Cope

Because you believe in me, and because you are my hero.

Karli Meg

Because you are my consistent source of the most perfect, God-inspired advice, and because I could not survive without your friendship.

Erin Marie Macdonald

Because you speak words of affirmation, encouragement and support into my life every day, and because you are truly my sister.

Erin Marie Chinen

Because you are more than my roommate: you are my beautiful, strong, talented iron.

Becca Marie

Because you are always there to listen to me and to either console me or laugh with me, and because you have the purest of hearts.

Kathryn Rose

Because you are simultaneously hilarious and wise, and because your friendship is irreplaceable.

Natalie Lynn

Because you inspire me, and because you remind me to always chase my dreams.

Krystal Lee

Because you are my very own personal therapist, and because your thoughtfulness means so much to me.

Christyn Wilkins

Because you are a role model for stability, even in times of change.

Megan Barnes

Because you bring a fresh perspective into every situation, and because your advice helps me to stay sane.

Jessica Martinson

Because no matter how much time passes between us, our friendship maintains a beautiful stability.

Rosanna Podesta

Because your friendship truly lights up my life.

Kristen Felicia

Because you are wise beyond your years.

Margaret Samuel

Because you get me.

Lindsay Jernigan

Because our souls are the same.

Ashleigh Ferguson

Because God ordained our summer in the PDC so as to create a lifelong friendship.

Jessica Wallace

Because you are the greatest intern (and an even greater friend).

Natalie Eastman

Because you are a breath of fresh air.

Emma Grace

Because your support and love in my life have meant more to me than you could ever know.

Chesed Lee

Because you are who I strive to be.

Michael Carter

Because God blessed me more than I deserve by providing me with a friend like you.

Brett Allan

Because, after all of our jokes are said and done, you mean the world to me.

Michael Robert

Because your friendship is constant and your character is consistently strong and reputable.

Matthew Bradshaw

Because you care deeply about keeping in touch, even if it means months of phone tag.

David Isaac

Because your hilarity brightens up my life, yet I always know I could come to you if I needed to discuss anything serious.

John T. Mammen

Because your knowledge, wisdom, advice and support have gotten me through the best and worst of times.

Geoffrey Baker

Because you motivate me to change the world.

Thomas Bush

Because you are genuine, down-to-earth, honest and refreshingly real, in addition to being my partner-in-crime.

David J. Pommer

Because you always let me third-wheel on dates with Ers, and because you are always willing to listen to me cry.

Andrew Blackmon

Because you are the other-brother-named-Andrew that I never had, and because I can trust you with anything.

Nicholas Michael

Because you are intelligent and wise while still possessing the ability to maintain an infinite wealth of knowledge regarding Will Ferrell quotes.

Christopher Neal

Because you never give up on our friendship.

Nicholas Mason

Because your friendship will never change, and because I know I can always count on you in times of need.

Joshua Wymyczak

Because I value your committed, loyal friendship more than you know.

Adam Shea

Because we are kindred spirits.

Matthew Hunter

Because I aim to have a heart as dedicated to service as yours.

Tanner Joyce

Because your presence never ceases to bring a smile to my face.

My Hero.

2009-02-04T16:33:00.001-08:00

I'm well aware of the fact that this Dave Barnes video is being posted completely out of season. Yes, I should have posted it in December but I happened to stumble across it again today (clearly, I've already seen it 329 times, most of those during the Christmas season) and I found myself literally laughing out loud. So regardless of the fact that I should be posting his Valentine's Day video, I just think this is his best, and it needs to have a presence on my blog somewhere.

But, in the spirit of Valentine's Day, here's another little treat from Dave himself. Click on the heart titled "February 4th" and be prepared for your life to be forever changed.

If this music career doesn't work out for Dave Barnes, he undoubtedly has a future in comedy.

(Disclaimer: Blogspot has been sucking lately. Sorry, Mom, for the use of that word, but it's the only one that can accurately capture my frustration regarding the fact that I've been unable to post videos in the format in which I'd like to post them.)

Sticks and Stones.

2009-02-02T18:47:00.000-08:00

Goodbye is the best way that I know / To forgive and still be letting go.

Dave Barnes

"Sticks and Stones"

Super Bowl.

2009-02-02T17:06:00.000-08:00

Wasn't it fun to finally watch a Super Bowl game that was competitive and full of surprises? The first half of the Cardinals vs. Steelers match-up yesterday was a bit slow but the second half was fantastic. Santonio Holmes' touchdown catch was the perfect depiction of poise and grace. His athleticism and the control he exercised over his body (planting those toes in the end zone takes concentration) defined the difference between college and professional football.

As a loyal Bears fan, I wasn't particularly concerned about who might win the game; I was more interested in watching 60 minutes of entertaining football/combat. That's what viewers got yesterday: A GAME. It's a good thing, too, considering that the commercials were nothing special.

More important than the game (no offense, Cardinals/Steelers fans) was the time I got to spend with my fabulous friends. About 15 of my favorite people gathered at Erin, Megan and my lovely Santa Monica apartment to watch the game, consume too many snacks and just be together. I love having people over. Our apartment is big enough to hold a large-sized group of people but small enough to keep the setting intimate. Every evening, we witness the SaMo Glow (the bright, golden awesomeness as the sun is about to start setting) from our balcony. Eventually, the golden rays turn into brilliant sunsets, which we also can see from our apartment situated conveniently five floors off of the ground. I love being able to share in the coziness of my home with my great friends. Having us all together was the best part of the day, really. Not to mention the fact that an hourlong episode of "The Office" followed the Super Bowl. Though I'm an outdoorsy person at heart, there is no place I would have rather been yesterday than perched atop my couch, inside of my lovely apartment with friends I wouldn't trade for the world.

Thankful.

2009-01-30T12:30:00.001-08:00

:: We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. ::

Thornton Wilder

Touch A Life Blog.

2009-01-30T11:08:00.000-08:00

Part of my new job is to write the blog for the Touch A Life Web site. I absolutely love writing blogs so this is a perfect task for me. Pam and I complement each other so well--she was thrilled to turn over her blogging responsibilities to me.

As if you weren't getting enough Rachel Johnson in your life already, now you have another forum on which to read some of my musings. Check it out.

2009 and Touch A Life.

2009-01-09T18:10:00.000-08:00

It's 2009 and I've started a job as the Director of Project Development with the best company in the world: the Touch A Life Foundation. I joined forces with Pam Cope (who I've mentioned in previous blog posts); she and I truly bonded on our trip to Ghana and conceived of the idea of working together after exchanging numerous e-mails during the fall.

I'm in Dallas, TX, now, where Pam and her family live, participating in a weeklong "orientation" of sorts. Pam and I are meeting with people, establishing connections with local supporters, commissioning jewelry, envisioning the year ahead and, essentially, just dreaming really big together. I am so blessed by this job and could not be more thankful for how God intentionally placed me in Pam's path. Pam trusts me and believes in me, allowing my creativity to truly flourish; without limitations, I feel free to explore, fail, get back up, try again and, ultimately and hopefully, succeed.

We're having a huge visionary meeting with everyone important to our foundation and the Village of Hope Orphanage next weekend and I'm so thrilled to be in the same room as so many talented, intelligent, driven, passionate people. God is amazing and if I weren't so tired and overwhelmed with the fabulousness of this week, I'd expand upon that point more...but I think I'll leave this post by just saying, again, thank you, Lord, for this opportunity I don't deserve. I won't let You down.

Love Don't Live Here.

2008-12-17T20:59:00.000-08:00

Sometimes you just need a good ole country jam like this...

:: well, this heart 'a mine

has been hardened like a stone

it might take some time

to get back what is gone

but i'm movin' on

and you don't haunt my dreams

like you did before

oh, and i will curse your name

hey!

well, i heard the news

that you were back in town

just passin' through

to claim your lost and found

but i'm over you

and there ain't nothin' there

that you could say or do

and take what you did back

you've got the nerve to waltz right in

and claim what's mine is yours again

'cause i've been doin' fine without you

forgettin' all the love we once knew

girl, i ain't the one that slammed that door

now you see a change of thinkin'

but i ain't got a heart for breakin'

so go and pick your bags up off my floor

'cause love don't live here anymore

oh, no

well, baby, you can try

to tell me how it is

and try to justify

everything you did

but, honey, i'm no fool

oh, and i been down this road

too many times with you

now i think it's best you go

well, i got one thing left to say

is you can lay in the bed you made

'cause i've been doin' fine without you

forgettin' all the love we once knew

girl, i ain't the one that slammed that door

now you see change of thinkin'

but i ain't got a heart for breakin'

so go and pick your bags up off my floor

oh, 'cause love don't live here anymore ::

Lady Antebellum

Same Kind of Different As Me.

2008-12-16T15:04:00.000-08:00

Based on a recommendation from a friend, I just started reading Same Kind of Different As Me by Ron Hall and Denver Moore. According to the book's Web site, here's the synopsis of the novel:

A dangerous homeless drifter who grew up picking cotton in virtual slavery...

An upscale art dealer accustomed to the world of Armani and Chanel...

A gutsy woman with a stubborn dream...

A story so incredible no novelist would dare dream it.

The story begins outside a burning plantation hut in Louisiana and within an East Texas honky-tonk...and, without a doubt, in the heart of God. It unfolds in a Hollywood hacienda, in an upscale New York Gallery, in a downtown dumpster, in a Texas ranch. Gritty with pain and betrayal and brutality, this story also shines with an unexpected, life-changing love.

"Just tell 'em I'm a nobody that's trying to tell ever'body 'bout a Somebody that can save anybody."
– Denver Moore

Comfortable.

2008-12-09T17:14:00.000-08:00

Some of the most poignant lyrics John Mayer has ever written.

:: i just remembered that time at the market
snuck up behind me and jumped on my shopping cart
and rode down aisle five
you looked behind you to smile back at me
crashed into a rack full of magazines
they asked us if we could leave

can't remember what went wrong last september
though i'm sure you'd remind me, if you had to

our love was comfortable
and so broken in

i sleep with this new girl i'm still getting used to
my friends all approve, say "she's gonna be good for you"
they throw me high fives
she says the Bible is all that she reads
and prefers that i not use profanity
your mouth was so dirty

life of the party and she swears that she's artsy
but you could distinguish miles from coltrane

our love was comfortable
and so broken in
she's perfect, so flawless
or so they say

she thinks i can't see the smile that she's faking
and poses for pictures that aren't being taken
i loved you gray sweatpants, no make-up, so perfect

our love was comfortable
and so broken in
she's perfect, so flawless
i'm not impressed
i want you back. ::

Donald Miller.

2008-12-08T23:19:00.000-08:00

:: It is always the simple things that change our lives. And these things never happen when you're looking for them to happen. Life will reveal answers at the pace life wishes to do so. You feel like running, but life is on a stroll. This is how God does things. ::

Donald Miller

Stuff White People Like.

2008-12-08T13:50:00.000-08:00

This hilarious blog never ceases to entertain me. It lists a variety of things that, stereotypically, white people like. I find myself able to relate with 70% of the items on the list, and each entry is so well-written. All of the posts are riddled with intelligent, ironic humor. Overall, the site is incredibly entertaining and worthy of being read.

For now, here's the current list of objects that white people adore, including comments regarding things I, too, enjoy...but check back as the blog is updated frequently.

1) Coffee.

True. Starbucks. Coffee Bean. All of it.

2) Religions their parents don't belong to.
3) Film festivals.
4) Assists.
5) Farmer's markets.

The Wednesday market in Santa Monica can't be beat.

6) Organic food.
7) Diversity.

I worked for the Intercultural Affairs Office. Enough said.

8) Barack Obama.
9) Making you feel bad about not going outside.

Katie Van Buskirk's definition of my very essence.

10) Wes Anderson movies.
11) Asian girls.

Two words: Erin Chinen.

12) Non-profit organizations.

Beginning on January 5th, I will be employed by one.

13) Tea.

There's nothing better than a chai latte.

14) Having black friends.

Am I allowed to mention Darnell here?

15) Yoga.

DVDs and classes--I've partaken in both.

16) Gifted children.

I was enrolled in Fast Paced Language Arts as a child.

17) Hating their parents.
18) Awareness.
19) Traveling.

Duh.

20) Being an expert on your culture.
21) Writer's workshops.
22) Having two last names.
23) Microbreweries.
24) Wine.

Again, duh.

25) David Sedaris.

I own all of his books.

26) Manhattan (now Brooklyn, too!)
27) Marathons.

I ran one in Rome in 2006. I ran a half in Long Beach in October.

28) Not having a TV.
29) 80s night.

How many college parties revolved around this theme?

30) Wrigley Field.

As a Chicago native, clearly I love this place.

31) Snowboarding.
32) Vegan/vegetarianism.

I'm not quite a vegetarian, but I'm really close. No red meat for this kid.

33) Marijuana.
34) Architecture.
35) The Daily Show/The Colbert Report.

So, so funny.

36) Breakfast places.

I would rather go out for breakfast than for any other meal. Hands down.

37) Renovations.
38) Arrested Development.

Aside from Friends and The Office, one of the best television shows of all time. Gob on the segway gets me every time.

39) Netflix.
40) Apple products.

I have a MacBook, a Nano, a Shuffle and an iPhone. Is all of that really necessary?

41) Indie music.

Death Cab for Cutie, the Postal Service and Decemberadio are amongst my favorites.

42) Sushi.

Nobu is truly heaven on earth.

43) Plays.

I was enrolled in a theater class while abroad in London and all we did was attend plays and musicals.

44) Public radio.
45) Asian fusion food.
46) The Sunday New York Times.
47) Arts degrees.
48) Whole Foods and grocery co-ops.

At CMPR, we frequent Whole Foods on a daily basis to make our lunch selections.

49) Vintage.

The older, the better.

50) Irony.
51) Living by the water.

Malibu. Santa Monica. Naples. Clearly.

52) Sarah Silverman.
53) Dogs.

Obviously. I can't wait until I can have my very own black cocker spaniel and black French bulldog. They will be friends for sure.

54) Kitchen gadgets.
55) Apologies.

As a confrontational person by nature, I've learned the importance of apologies.

56) Lawyers.
57) Juno.

Amazing movie. Deserved more Oscar recognition than it received.

58) Japan.
59) Natural medicine.
60) Toyota Prius.
61) Bicycles.

See my previous post regarding my brand new beach cruiser.

62) Knowing what's best for poor people.
63) Expensive sandwiches.

I've definitely been willing to spend more than $8.00 on a sandwich, which is really insane, if you think about it. But, apparently, also really worth it.

64) Recycling.

Mom has taught me well in terms of recycling.

65) Co-ed sports.
66) Divorce.
67) Standing still at concerts.
68) Michel Gondry.
69) Mos Def.
70) Difficult breakups.

Baha! Unfortunately I can claim this one, too.

71) Being the only white person around.
72) Study abroad.

Lived, studied and interned in London...twice.

73) Gentrification.
74) Oscar parties.
75) Threatening to move to Canada.
76) Bottles of water.
77) Musical comedy.

Does Avenue Q count?

78) Multilingual children.
79) Modern furniture.

Love the types that come from everywhere, ranging from IKEA and Target to Anthropologie and Pottery Barn.

80) The idea of soccer.
81) Graduate school.
82) Hating corporations.
83) Bad memories of high school.
84) T-shirts.

American Apparel is my mecca.

85) The wire.
86) Shorts.

I own way too many pairs.

87) Outdoor performance clothes.

Couldn't live without North Face.

88) Having gay friends.
89) St. Patrick's Day.
90) Dinner parties.

One of my favorite things to do on a given night is to host/attend a dinner party.

91) San Francisco.

Couldn't visit Karli Meg, Becca and the boys there enough.

92) Book deals.
93) Music piracy.
94) Free healthcare.
95) Rugby.
96) New Balance shoes.
97) Scarves.

I think I own at least 20,000. And I'd like to own more.

98) The Ivy League.
99) Grammar.

I'm so anal about punctuation and correcting misspellings.

100) Bumper stickers.
101) Being offended.
102) Children's games as adults.
103) Sweaters.
104) Girls with bangs.

I definitely rocked the side bangs this summer/fall.

105) Unpaid internships.

I had three while in college: NBC, Bang Showbiz and St. Jude Children's Research Hospital Entertainment Marketing Office.

106) Facebook.

Unfortunately, so true for me.

107) Self-aware hip hop references.
108) Appearing to enjoy classical music.
109) The Onion.

A hilarious online publication I love to read.

110) Frisbee sports.
111) Peacoats.
112) Hummus.

Delicious. A staple in my diet.

113) Halloween.
114) America.
115) Promising to learn a new language.

Traveling Mercies.

2008-12-04T10:41:00.000-08:00

:: The depth of the feeling [grief, loss] continued to surprise and threaten me, but each time it hit again and I bore it, like a nicotine craving, I would discover that it hadn't washed me away. After a while it was like an inside shower, washing off some of the rust and calcification in my pipes. It was like giving a dry garden a good watering. Don't get me wrong: grief sucks; it really does. Unfortunately, though, avoiding it robs us of life, of the now, of a sense of living spirit...A fixation can keep you nicely defined and give you the illusion that your life has not fallen apart. But since your life may indeed have fallen apart, the illusion won't hold up forever, and if you are lucky and brave, you will be willing to bear disillusion. You begin to cry and write and yell and then to keep on crying; and then, finally, grief ends up giving you the two best things: softness and illumination. ::

Anne Lamott

Twenty Three.

2008-12-03T12:46:00.000-08:00

I can't believe that I'm 23 years old! Wow, wow. Time has seriously flown by.

Technology has allowed for my friends and family from afar to make me feel so incredibly loved on my birthday. With everything from text messages, phone calls, voicemails and e-mail chains, the people in my life have really lifted me up on this special day.

I don't know if this is, like...allowed...but this is my blog, after all, so I'm going to share some e-mails from the "yo family" (as it's fondly called) e-mail chain that my beautiful college friends and I started around the time of graduation. Before we left school, we'd e-mail each other regarding each night's happenings/plans; since we've left, we e-mail everything from life updates and funny goings-on at work to silly jokes and holiday traditions.

Today there's a very special family e-mail chain going on regarding my birthday. Karli started it by suggesting my friends e-mail their favorite memory of our friendship out for us all to read and enjoy, and I thought I'd include their responses on this, my 23rd birthday post.

From Karli Meg:

"In honor of this fabulous day of Rach's birth, I propose that we all share our favorite memory of a time spent with Miss Johnson. I will begin...

I actually have way too many amazing memories with Rach to pick a fave, but I'll pick one that recently occurred. In October Rach came to visit me in Pleasanton. We basically just spent the entire weekend eating, laughing at ridiculous YouTube videos, making our television debut, and exploring Sausalito. This is just one example of what an amazing friend Rach is. She came all the way up to see me and then we had the best time doing basically nothing. That is, to me, the sign of true and deep friendship. Best friendship, I'd say!

Also: Malibu Beach Inn fire pit. Pomegranate margs at Terra. Running into the ocean with our clothes on. Done."

From Kimberly Anne:

"My favorite memory of Rachel Elizabeth Johnson was in the summer of 2005, when we took a romantic day trip to Laguna Beach - shopped, ate, talked, walked on the beach, and got Goldenspoon, of course."

From Erin Marie:

"Well, amongst a bevy of memories that all are near and dear to my heart, probably one of the sweetest was freshman year of college when we'd cuddle in rach's bed and eat ice cream and watch friends and not go to Com 200.

More recently, one of the highlights is the one night we had too much wine and decided that going to the gym and making a workout video was a good idea....and that going level 9 speed on the treadmill while being intoxicated was smart as well."

From Leslie Horvath:

"Happy day of your birth!!! Seriously, you tell BMJ thank you for giving us you! As for my favorite memory...Well, that is simple! One evening when a dear friend Carter Blanton was in town Rachel, Carter, and myself were hanging out on a street corner in the city of Santa Monica when a rather random and diverse group of men approached us... 1 decided he would like to bubble wrap me, take me to China, and feed me cereal, all while watching Japanese anime. Another wondered why we didn't have a toaster and inquired about Ms. Johnson's affiliation with Ninjas. Then there was the white middle aged guy. All in all, it was a night to remember... Which I do often:)

Rach, another fond memory would be having that incredible brunch with you and Emily Merrell in London! Soooo good!"

From Geoffrey Baker:

"First off, Feliz Cumpleaños Rach! I hope you have a flabbergastingly great day! (Yes. I just invented a new use of the word flabbergast for you.)

Secondly, even though I was a bit of a late comer to the familia I have so many great memories with you that I am finding it hard to pick just one… Oh wait. That's a lie. I know exactly which memory is my favorite. It was one night, at one of the many parties held at the Point Dume Club. The two of us came to the realization that the drinking game that was currently being played was fun, but not quite enough to keep us entertained and adequately satiated. Sooo we decided to play a couple little games on the side, the first of which was whoever said drink first won and the other person had to drink; the second, and in my opinion more ingenious, was the first person to "shoot" the other and make the sound of a gun, won and the other person had to drink, usually while pretending to die in the most cheesy and overdramatic way possible. Drink! Bang!

C. Cheesy (but true) quote time: "Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young." Sir Arthur Wing Pinero. According to Sir Pinero, you have nothing to fear lass, because you love life with a depth that would challenge Mother Teresa, God bless 'er (and you of course.)

Lastly, my only encounter with your parents was at the graduation party and they were incredible; between your dad and the cigars and the way your mom kept delivering (aka. forcing) food...incredible. Therefore, I know you are in good hands tonight and I know that the celebration will be nothing short of what you deserve. May your glass never be empty.

Love you Rach. Oh and one more thing...mascara. That is my second favorite memory. You know what I'm talkin about Rach. Miss ya."

From Michael Carter Blanton:

(Not as much as of a story as it is a rap...but amazing nonetheless.)

"I made a rap
fo yo birfday
I's screamin all da way
From Tenness-ay

Iz yo birfday
So lez git happY
Tonite I hopes
that yuu git sloppY

Yuu can try n' play Convict
Cuz thaz yo game
but widout us all der
Iz not da same

Yuu mite go bladin
Down by da pier
but widout us all der
Yuu gon shed a tear

Yuu be pimpin Leona
Down hiway one
But in a empty car
It juz aint no fun

You can had alatta fun
Down in Newport Beech
2 bad all uz
R outta reech

Dey say LA's
Da town Kiedis made
Da Lakers, Da Dodgers,
Da Promenade

Da City uh Angels
Getz so dern crowded
Tonite'll be crazy
No doubt aboudet

So from da 615 to da 310
Da Eastside Nash all da wayta SanMo

Happy birfday
And juz keep on bleedin
Pritty soon u go ta Texas
Helpin the needin

Whammy!"

From Nicholas Michael Spence:

"Probably one of the best, most wonderful, most amazingly spectacular Rachel memories I have is when we ditched malibu, jumped in Erin's jeep listening to Jack Johnson (quoting Will Ferrell the entire time), and jumped off of rocks into the clear ponds! That was the beginning of the I Phelta Thi Froroity. Though we didn't actually DO anything, we were definitely the coolest kids on campus. Our legacy lives on..."

Giving Thanks, Posted Late.

2008-12-02T12:03:00.000-08:00

Wait, it's December already. Really? Time has flown. September dragged along so slowly; it was definitely the most difficult month for me. There was so much transitioning occurring--school had started and my friends and I weren't returning, jobs were sparse and I wasn't yet working, some relationships in my life were ending and I was adjusting to my new life in Santa Monica.

So much has changed since then, job-wise, faith-wise, relationship-wise and, basically, life-wise. I feel so blessed to be at the point of life that I'm in now. Though this isn't an original idea, I wanted to take some time in between the Thanksgiving and Christmas seasons to jot down some things that I am so thankful for in my life.

apartment 509. bs 1 and 2. having the luxury of saying, "oh, i'm just going to go downstairs and grab some starbucks."

speaking of starbucks, red cup and holiday drink season.
stuffing, potluck potatoes, broccoli casserole and turkey. pumpkin pie and persimmon pudding. morning quizzes accompanied by prize money. wheaton, illinois. mom, dad and brother. "what happens in vegas," coupled by mimosas. john mcbride, my pseudo-grandfather.
scarves, uggs and wintry breezes.
december beaching. montana avenue. having to over-compensate with decorations because southern california doesn't exactly have the same seasons that we do in the midwest...which i'm actually very thankful for.
twinkling white lights, ice skating and gingerbread houses.
home-cooked meals. community group. laughter. mulled wine. gossip girl reruns.
"it's better in a sweater" parties. holiday soirees in west hollywood.
the anticipation of a weekend spent with the most wonderful women in the world (exculding my momma, who is unable to attend).
christmas gifts and tree loans from my fantastic boss at cmpr. company lunches and coffee breaks. maggie, cmpr's resident puppy.
the brink of a budding career with the touch a life foundation.
candy canes and mint cookie joys.
the return of the greatest two-disc christmas compilation known to mankind. family secret santas and excessively long e-mail chains.
jesus: the reason for the season.
ski weekends in vail. johnson + joyce. snowflakes, hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps, north face jackets and memories in the making.
december prayer lists. world vision's gift catalogue. evergreen trees and christmas ornaments.
good health, great friends, fabulous family.
the best life.

The Explorer.

2008-11-17T14:22:00.000-08:00

:: If you're going to create the life of your dreams, you have to once again choose to explore. You need to make it a life mandate to learn everything and anything you need to know to turn your dreams into reality. You have to start making yourself flexible and pliable again, because if you stop learning, you will stop growing and will never create a life beyond the one you have right now...

When you are called out by God, you have to take on a learning mode that recognizes you are called by God to explore unknown territories and go to uncertain environments. To some of you, God is literally saying, You need to leave your country, your relatives, your house and go to a place you've never known if you are going to live the life of your dreams...

I wonder if some of you need to move to Tibet or maybe India or South America. Or maybe you need to find a way to deal with the issue of AIDS in Africa. Is it possible that to create the life of your dreams, you need to get up and leave what you know and relinquish the security of what you have in order to discover what you only see in your imagination? Remember, there is always a hero within you waiting to be awakened--that hero is the explorer. ::

-- Erwin McManus

I've been reading through Erwin's newest book, Wide Awake, as well as diving deeper into the text through Erwin's Sunday services (he's doing an eight week series on the book) and a weekly small group gathering. The content with the book has resonated with me and this time of my life so much. I have been blessed in insane ways and I am so excited to explore the next step in my life journey so that I am fully able to live in dreams awake.

Keep Bleedin'.

2008-11-12T11:38:00.000-08:00

"Bleeding Love" (by Leona Lewis) just came on the radio at work and totally tugged on my heartstrings. Oddly, even though the song's lyrics are essentially about heartache, it's a song that for some reason represents my group of college friends and the few weeks that led up to graduation. I don't know who decided that this made sense (Carter? Brad?) but now whenever I hear that soulful jam, I am instantly brought back to our group's last days in Malibu, back to the memories we made and back to the amazing times we shared.
Isn't music incredible in that way? Songs will crop up out of nowhere and remind me of very specific times in my life. "Everything's Right" (Matt Wertz) takes me back to high school graduation. "Forever" (Chris Brown) will always remind me of Bethany and Ryan's wedding, as well as my fabulous summer of 2008 spent in Malibu. Anything Backstreet Boys, N*Sync or pre-insane Britney makes me reminisce about my middle school days. "Waiting Room" (Shane and Shane) is so indicative of my freshman year at Pepperdine, as is "Breathe" (Michelle Branch). "Stop This Train" (John Mayer) was my anthem during senior year; anything Postal Service reminds me of my semester in London in 2006, as does "Home" (Michael Buble). "Real Girl" (Mutya Buena) forms images of Rick Sky, Bang Showbiz and London Summer '07 in my head, while "Wouldn't it Be Nice" (Beach Boys) brings back memories of cruising down PCH to go Rollerblading in Venice during sophomore year.I could go on forever, really, but the point is that music has an ability that no other medium has to transport us from our current state into a different time in our lives. Music is almost like a time machine; when certain notes and lyrics strike our ears, we are taken back to a former place (good or bad) in our lives, and our memories are inexplicably linked to the tunes playing on our radios or iPods. Music is a universal langugage that has the power to overcome obstacles, unite different types of people and allow us to relive amazing memories.

Music is beautiful; it is essential to our existence and to the preservation of our favorite times in life. So, with that, just keep bleedin'. Keep, keep bleedin' love.

Psalm 105:1-2.

2008-11-11T14:10:00.000-08:00

:: Give thanks to the Lord, call on his name; make known among the nations what he has done. Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all of his wonderful acts. ::

Francis de Sales.

2008-11-07T14:54:00.001-08:00

:: My dearest daughter, we must not be unjust and require from ourselves what is not in ourselves...Have patience with yourself. ::

Shea and Rachel's Infinite Foodlist.

2008-11-06T17:06:00.000-08:00

This morning was such a treat. Shea, Becca and I had breakfast together at Urth Cafe on Main Street in Santa Monica. Bex was up in Santa Barbara visiting her grandparents and she spent the night at Five Oh Nine last night, which was so much fun. We met Shea for breakfast this morning before Bex had to head back to San Diego. Shea and I decided to peruse Main Street and, as we were walking, we also decided to make a running list of fabulous-looking restaurants that we need to try.

I think when Shea said I should write about this on my blog, he was teasing...but I'm going to post part of our list anyway:

1) Chinois on Main. Wolfgang Puck's restaurant. Maybe Ers can hook it up there.
2) Holy Guacamole. A neighborhood taco stand.
3) The Library. The beer is great but the food must be tried.
4) Wild Flour. A quaint, brightly painted pizza joint. Supposedly the best in L.A.
5) Via Veneto. Happy hour all day on Sundays.
6) The Fire House. Delectable-looking food and the cutest patio, adorned with red and yellow Chinese lanterns.
7) Chaya Venice. Great-looking seafood and sushi.
8) Schatzi on Main. The fact that this is Arnold Schwarzenegger's restaurant piqued my interest.
9) Novel Cafe. Shea and I went in here for some delicious vanilla chai lattes but I'd love to try the food.

To be continued...

The One Where Ross is Fine.

2008-11-06T16:38:00.000-08:00

This excerpt, from Season10, is from one of my favorite "Friends" episodes of all time. Ross invites Rachel and Joey over for dinner, along with his girlfriend Charlie Wheeler. Ross used to date Rachel; Joey used to date Charlie. All in all, it is an incredibly awkward experience and Ross is very clearly incapable of handling the fact that Joey and Rachel, two of his best friends, are in a relationship. In an attempt to create a fun Mexican feasts for his guests, Ross prepares fajitas and margaritas....and then he drinks way too many margaritas and doesn't counter it by eating enough fajitas.

[Ross recently found out that Joey and Rachel are dating and is now drunk on margaritas. He decides to make a toast to his dinner guests.]

Ross: Ah, love. L-O-V-E, love. "L" is for life. I mean, what is life without love?

[long pause]

Rachel: [to Joey] Oh my God, are we supposed to answer?

Ross: "O" is for...oh, wow! "V"...is for this very...surprising turn of events...which I am still fine with, by the way!

[long pause...Ross's dinner guests believe he is done with his toast and turn back to their margaritas. They are interrupted by Ross's incessant squealing.]

Ross: "EEEE"...is for how extreeeemeeely...normal...I find it that you two are together!

[some further conversation ensues and the timer goes off in the kitchen. Ross has no idea what could be finished cooking, seeing as he has already provided his guests with all of the Mexican treats their hearts could desire. He goes into the kitchen and returns carrying a tray, having drunkenly forgotten to wear oven mitts.]

Ross: I guess I made Tater tots!

Jantsen's Gift.

2008-11-05T13:25:00.001-08:00

Pam Cope's book, Jantsen's Gift: A True Story of Grief, Rescue and Grace, is available for pre-order on Amazon.com. Get it.

Book Synopsis:

Nine years ago, Pam Cope owned a cozy hair salon in the tiny town of Neosho, Missouri, and her life revolved around her son's baseball games, her daughter's dance lessons, and family trips to places like Disney World. She had never been out of the country, nor had she any desire to travel far from home.

Then, on June 16th, 1999, her life changed forever with the death of her 15-year-old son from an undiagnosed heart ailment.

Needing to get as far away as possible from everything that reminded her of her loss, she accepted a friend's invitation to travel to Vietnam, and, from the moment she stepped off the plane, everything she had been feeling since her son's death began to shift. By the time she returned home, she had a new mission: to use her pain to change the world, one small step at a time, one child at a time. Today, she is the mother of two children adopted from Vietnam. More than that, she and her husband have created a foundation called "Touch A Life," dedicated to helping desperate children in countries as far-flung as Vietnam, Cambodia and Ghana.

Pam Cope's story is on one level a moving, personal account of loss and recovery, but on a deeper level, it offers inspiration to anyone who has ever suffered great personal tragedy or those of us who dream about making a difference in the world.

History in the Making.

2008-11-05T12:57:00.001-08:00

Yesterday was craziness. A record number of voters made it to polls to speak their mind regarding our country's future. Everywhere you looked you saw citizens sporting "I Voted" stickers. Every channel on TV, ranging from news stations to MTV, was reporting on election coverage. In California, Election Day was made even crazier by the emphasis based on voting for propositions, namely the controversial and highly debated Proposition 8. Every other word out of everyone's mouth was "Obama" or "McCain."

I didn't blog about this during campaign season because I wasn't interested in sparking additional political conflict or debate amongst anyone but a few weeks I decided to vote for John McCain. Obviously, that didn't work out too well for me and I was surprisingly sad about it last night, even though I was never incredibly invested in his platform. Instead of focusing on McCain's loss, I thought about something pastor Erwin McManus said at the Mayan on Sunday night: "If I thought the way to change the world was to be in Washington, I would be there. But I'm not. I'm here at Mosaic, here in L.A." Politics are important but not the way to revolutionize the world.

That being said, yesterday was still an incredibly historic day. It is amazing to be alive in a time when people are finally politically and worldly conscious of the events occurring around them. And regardless of the fact that the candidate I voted for lost, yesterday was still a hugely important day for me and for every American citizen.

I didn't watch Obama's acceptance speech last night but I did read it today and I think it's worth posting. No matter how you voted, a decision has been made and today is a new day. Time to move on and use every opportunity we have to make the world a better place.

Barack Obama's Presidential Acceptance Speech

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer. It’s the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen, by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different, that their voices could be that difference. It’s the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled. Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been just a collection of individuals or a collection of red states and blue states.

We are, and always will be, the United States of America. It’s the answer that led those who’ve been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It’s been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this date in this election at this defining moment change has come to America.It’s the answer that led those who’ve been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It’s been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this date in this election at this defining moment change has come to America.

A little bit earlier this evening, I received an extraordinarily gracious call from Senator McCain. Senator McCain fought long and hard in this campaign. And he’s fought even longer and harder for the country that he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine. We are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him; I congratulate Governor Palin for all that they’ve achieved. And I look forward to working with them to renew this nation’s promise in the months ahead.

I want to thank the rock of our family, the love of my life, the nation’s next first lady, Michelle Obama. Sasha and Malia, I love you both more than you can imagine. And you have earned the new puppy that’s coming with us to the new White House. And while she’s no longer with us, I know my grandmother’s watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight. I know that my debt to them is beyond measure. To my sister Maya, my sister Alma, all my other brothers and sisters, thank you so much for all the support that you’ve given me. I am grateful to them. And to my campaign manager, David Plouffe, the unsung hero of this campaign, who built the best — the best political campaign, I think, in the history of the United States of America. To my chief strategist David Axelrod, who’s been a partner with me every step of the way. To the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics, you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you’ve sacrificed to get it done.

But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to. It belongs to you. It belongs to you.

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn’t start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington. It began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston. It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause.

It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation’s apathy, who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep. It drew strength from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on doors of perfect strangers, and from the millions of Americans who volunteered and organized and proved that more than two centuries later a government of the people, by the people, and for the people has not perished from the Earth. This is your victory.

And I know you didn’t do this just to win an election. And I know you didn’t do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime — two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after the children fall asleep and wonder how they’ll make the mortgage or pay their doctors’ bills or save enough for their child’s college education. There’s new energy to harness, new jobs to be created, new schools to build, and threats to meet, alliances to repair. The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even in one term. But, America, I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you, we as a people will get there.

There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won’t agree with every decision or policy I make as president. And we know the government can’t solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And, above all, I will ask you to join in the work of remaking this nation, the only way it’s been done in America for 221 years — block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

What began 21 months ago in the depths of winter cannot end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek. It is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were.

It can’t happen without you, without a new spirit of service, a new spirit of sacrifice.

So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves but each other. Let us remember that, if this financial crisis taught us anything, it’s that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers.

In this country, we rise or fall as one nation, as one people. Let’s resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let’s remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House, a party founded on the values of self-reliance and individual liberty and national unity. Those are values that we all share. And while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress.

As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn, I may not have won your vote tonight, but I hear your voices. I need your help. And I will be your president, too.

And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces, to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of the world, our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those — to those who would tear the world down: We will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security: We support you. And to all those who have wondered if America’s beacon still burns as bright: Tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope.

That’s the true genius of America: that America can change. Our union can be perfected. What we’ve already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow. This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that’s on my mind tonight’s about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She’s a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing: Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn’t vote for two reasons — because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin. And tonight, I think about all that she’s seen throughout her century in America — the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can’t, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes, we can.

At a time when women’s voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes, we can.

When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs, a new sense of common purpose. Yes, we can.

When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes, we can.

She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that “We Shall Overcome.” Yes, we can.

A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes, we can.

America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves — if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have? This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time, to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth, that, out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubts and those who tell us that we can’t, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people: Yes, we can.

Thank you. God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America.

The Five People You Meet in Malibu.

2008-11-04T16:39:00.001-08:00

This morning, Blake Lown and I were about to enjoy some delicious coffee at Starbucks (where holiday cups are back in full force, which is so exciting) when we had an extremely interesting encounter with another caffeine-addicted patron. Blake and I were patiently waiting in line to order; both of the registers were occupied with customers providing their beverage details to the baristas. The woman behind us steps up and says, "Can I go in front of you girls?" Now, if Blake and I had been obnoxiously scouring over each and every pastry, or if we had been struggling to decide which syrup to put into which latte, AND if this lady was on fire/in the hugest hurry ever, I would have understood her impatience. However, none of these things was occurring so, needless to say, Blake and I were extremely confused. We weren't in a rush so we allowed her to go ahead of us. How one can let a situation like this pass them by and not laugh is beyond me so laugh is exactly what we did. Perturbed by our enjoyment of her insanity, hurried-and-harried lady turned around and said, "I gave you the opportunity to say no." The phrase that instantly ran through my mind was, What is honestly happening here?

We were actually on Main Street in Santa Monica when this occurred but it reminded me so much of my former life in Malibu. Much of the time, that is my mindset when I am in that lovely coastal town: What is going on here? I love Malibu. It is so eccentric and most of the people who live there are unexpectedly fascinating. After having lived in Malibu for four years, I've decided that there are five specific types of people who reside there:

1) The secret celeb.
Secret celebs are, you guessed it, average-appearing people who are surprisingly renowned or wealthy. They maintain a relatively low profile and, in comparison to the Pamela Anderson-types zooming around the 'bu, they are less likely to be attacked by the paparazzi. But they crop up out of nowhere all the time.

My favorite instance regarding this type of Malibu-ite (what is the word for a local Malibu resident? Malibuan? Malibu-ite?) is rooted in a memory from this summer. I was working on some script coverage at Coffee Bean and this insanely hilarious elderly man struck up a conversation with me. He showed me magazine clippings of himself in his prime, told me all about his life and asked me out on a date, despite the fact that he is married. I came to learn that he was Mike Silverman, realtor to the stars. Not exactly a household name but worthy and successful enough to be written up in the New York Times at his ripe old age of 89. And how would I have ever known if he hadn't plopped down next to me with his tea latte and made conversation with me?

2) The overly-Botoxed 60-year-old.These interesting Malibu creatures rarely leave the comfort of their natural habitat, their natural habitat being their mansions tucked back in the hills, overlooking the ocean. On rare occasions, though, they will leave the safety of their homes to traverse down the hill into town to be seen at a charity event, to vote in any and every election and to brunch at Geoffrey's. Oh, and, obviously, to get their weekly Botox treatments. In case you didn't know, Malibu Urgent Care, located on PCH, was about to close until they started offering Botox treatments to clients. Now it is open and very busy, largely in part to these grandmothers who wish to be regarded as 35-year-olds for the rest of their lives. Most likely these Botox fiends are married to Mike Silverman-esque types who can afford to pay for their weekly treatments. They may have been famous back in the day but now they simply do work for charity.

3) The Pepperdine student.
Clearly, this demographic represents my favorite group of Malibu residents. Surprisingly diverse, the Pepperdine community contains a variety of individuals, ranging from conservative, overly-churched Church of Christ kiddos to Valley girls in possession of their daddy's credit cards. Most of my favorite people in this world are a part of this over-arching community, and they mostly represent the middle ground constituent found at Pepperdine. Hailing from Northern California, Southern California, Portland, Nashville, Colorado, Chicago and Texas, my friends all have relatively different backgrounds, allowing them to share their unique experiences with one another upon their arrival to school. The common thread that unites us is our faith in Christ, and it creates a powerful bond between us that is unlikely to be broken, regardless of what part of the country we've been scattered to after graduation.

Though I think 99.9% of the student body at Pepperdine is fabulous, not all Malibu locals agree. This is evidenced by the fact that every establishment (aside from the classy Jack in the Box and Malibu Inn) closes by 10:00 p.m. as if there was no one over the age of 11 living within the city's limits. A day person by nature, this fact has never really upset me, but it is clearly indicative of the fact that Malibu was meant to be a retreat for people, a place where things close early, where sleep is found easily, where noise doesn't keep people up at night, where there is an air of relaxation. I completely appreciate that attitude, except when it's imposed upon me by obnoxious neighbors residing in the Malibu Villas complex, where I lived for my last two years of college. Most of the adults living there are, in my opinion, secretly jealous that they are no longer in college and they wish to take that out on the students that live in their neighborhood. Mostly they call the cops at every chance they get, bang on shared walls if they hear even the slightest squeak after 9:00 p.m. and employ incompetent "guards" to protect their dwellings. Truthfully, this behavior was regarded by me and my friends as humorous, so it never impeded on our fun.

4) The hippie-surfer.
The hippie-surfer is the type most vacationers expect to encounter when coming to Malibu, I think. Back in the 1930s, when the community of Malibu as we know it today was truly born, the main constituents of the town were outdoorsy adventurers who loved to explore the nearby waters of the Pacific Ocean, mainly through the mode of surfing. Most of these people wish that Malibu was the way it was back in the day--clean, quiet and free of paparazzi. I still think Malibu is clean and relatively quiet (especially when compared to nearby Hollywood or downtown L.A., or even to Santa Monica) but I understand what they're saying about the celebrity photographers. A lot of the original Malibuans are best described using the term "granola": they're earthy, free-spirited and environmentally conscious. They don't like their land being dominated by gossip hounds and star-struck visitors and I get that. Malibu is so naturally breathtaking and its natural beauty should be preserved.

Malibu's local beaches are packed with surfers every day. The waves are full of athletes riding their long and short-boards. Some surfers get hostile, though, which I don't really like. They get territorial over their waves and their beaches, as evidenced by the paparazzi abuse instance back in June. Though not a surfer myself, I can understand where their angst comes from, even if I sometimes disagree with how they display their anger. I've been bulldozed by the paparazzi a few times while perusing the Malibu Colony and it's quite annoying. Malibu is a beautiful, sleepy town and the hippie-surfer locals are quick to speak their mind regarding the fact that it should stay that way.

5) The town astrologer.

The person I'm thinking of specifically as I begin to describe the fifth type of Malibu local is Space. He's a homeless man who can always be found at Starbucks. Whether you ask him to or not, he will provide you with your daily horoscope. He is hilarious, sometimes over-bearing and always refreshing. An example of a daily interaction with Space as is follows: Lindsay Jernigan and I were chatting with Space in his usual haunt (Starbucks, of course) when he observed that we had similar light blue eyes. He told Lindsay that though are eyes were alike, he liked hers better than mine. I teased him, asking him how dare he make such a blatant comment in front of my face. He leaned towards me and whispered, "She's new. I have to say that and try to get her. If it doesn't work out, I'll come back to you. " Flattering.

There's a huge community of men and women just like Space who live in Malibu. They are mostly found striking up conversation outside of Malibu Yo in the Malibu Colony Plaza. They are entertaining, ever-present staples of the Malibu community. I don't think the town would be the same without them.

I have a particularly fond memory of Space from this summer. Ashleigh Ferguson and I were frequenting Starbucks on a daily basis and one specific morning, we ran into Space as we were ordering our chai lattes. He summoned us over to where he was sitting, excited to show us a plethora of pastries, bagels and muffins a Starbucks employee had given him earlier that morning. This man, this homeless man who has nothing, asked us to choose some goodies to take home with us. Ashleigh and I quickly refused, claiming we couldn't take his baked goods from him, but thanks for the offer. Space insisted that we have some of the treats, even going as far as shoving muffins and scones into our purses. He forced us to bring a cookie home for "our tall friend," too (meaning Becca). I was blown away by this act of generosity. This man doesn't have anything; yet he wanted to give it all away to girls who have everything. This story is a reason, amongst many others, that I believe the Malibu community wouldn't be the same without astrologers like Space.

So there you have it. A brief synopsis of what Malibu locals are really like. Malibu Magazine did a great photo series in June, capturing images of locals in their everyday life. Truly, the Malibu community is a special one. Come visit and see for yourself.

Live.

2008-11-03T11:25:00.001-08:00

:: TOO ALIVE to just stand still. ::

Perseverance.

2008-10-31T15:22:00.000-07:00

:: Pray to God, but keep rowing to shore. ::

Halloween Hopes.

2008-10-30T16:19:00.000-07:00

Normally I really dislike Halloween. I don't really know why. Actually, I do. I think there are a number of reasons. First of all, I never really have liked dressing up for anything: Halloween, theme parties, costume chapter, etc. I can never think of any good ideas and I hate competing with all of the young women out there whose ideas of dressing up include transforming into scandalous animals and insects. Not for me. Also, I'd always envisioned Halloween to be a night of drunken debauchery. Which is still true, I suppose, and, believe me, I enjoy a few cocktails/beers/glasses of wine/what-have-you every now and again, but I have always thought this holiday was created for people to make drunken mistakes, and I'm not super sure I'm okay with that. Drinking in the company of friends is fun and safe but sometimes I think that people use Halloween to legitimize insane behavior. (I'll get off my soapbox now). Lastly, I dislike Halloween because I've grown past the point of being able to go trick-or-treating. I know, I know; it's a free world and technically I could still grovel for candy if I wanted to but that would just be plain weird at the ripe old age of 22. That being said, I'm surprisingly excited for Halloween. I have so many fun plans for tomorrow that I must admit that I really can't wait to celebrate All Hallow's Eve.

In the morning, Maggie Samuel and I will be breakfasting at Sprinkles Cupcakes. It might seem to be a little too early to be indulging in delicious mini-cakes but, really, it's never too early for cupcakes. Maggie and I have a tradition (okay, this will only be the third time) of planning Sprinkles and Starbucks dates and I'm pretty excited to try out the Halloween/fall flavors of tomorrow, including chai latte, pumpkin and caramel apple.

For lunch, my boss Emily is taking me and my coworker, Courtney, to Chipotle for lunch. Originally, the three of us had planned to dress up as burritos in order to earn free ones, as per a deal that Chipotle offers every Halloween. I have participated in this event for the past three years, stopping in at the Calabasas Chipotle with friends including Erin, Karli, Becca, Katie VB, Mammen, Davids Schwartz and Nelson, Brad, Clark and Mike to score free burritos. Sadly, Chipotle doesn't offer this deal at lunch so Ers and I already made plans to eat there for dinner. Despite learning that we would not be the recipients of free food, Emily still offered to treat Courtney and me to lunch there on behalf of Halloween. So, fine, free Chipotle twice in one day is, yes, overindulgent but also delicious-sounding.

Good thing my perfect Halloween only includes eating thus far--shows where my priorities are, I suppose. Assuming I can still walk/waddle after I've consumed all of this fabulous food, I plan on zooming down to Malibu for what should be an epic party at Mikey, Dorian and Andrew's place (affectionately known to most of our friends as T-Land). Tomorrow night will also signify Joel and Rose's last night in California; they're moving to Nicaragua on Saturday, and tomorrow night will be a great way to send them off. All of my favorite people are going to be there and I can't wait to see everyone's costumes, particularly Shea Miller's, which I'm hoping will look my favorite character in the made-for-YouTube-film, Jackie and Debra.

I actually am going to dress up. I'm going to be a Malibu local and I don't mean the scary surf type who steals your table on Taco Tuesday at Duke's; rather, I'll be channeling the Mary-Kate and Ashley Olson version of Malibu chic, complete with Uggs, short shorts, too much jewelry, an extremely oversized bag, at least fourteen scarves, possibly a fedora and the ever-present Venti Starbucks cup.

I can't believe I'm admitting this but I really just can't wait for tomorrow. Hopefully Halloween turns out as great as I expect it to.

GOOD Advice.

2008-10-29T14:56:00.000-07:00

For the past few weeks at Starbucks, GOOD Magazine has been releasing a free mini-publication of sorts regarding issues concerning the upcoming presidential election. Every Thursday, a new pamphlet is available near the barista station where you pick up your latte or Frappucino. The pamphlet is great because it informs readers of prevalent issues without any bias; the facts and figures on each page are dedicated to educating readers, not to persuading them one way or another.

Last Thursday's (10/23) issue was about close elections and the importance of voting. The pamphlet highlighted a variety of elections in which a smaller number of votes determined the race's winner. Apparently in 1977, the mayoral race in Ann Arbor, Michigan, was decided by one single vote. Though the the election was not on the scale of a presidential race, size-wise, the statistic had a huge impact on me. Louis Belcher earned 10,659 votes; Albert Wheeler barely snuck by, winning 10,660 votes. Can you imagine being the vote that changed the course of history for Ann Arbor? Can you imagine being the vote that changed the course of history for our country in this election, for the year of 2008? Maybe your vote will change the world.

My favorite part of the weekly pamphlet is the section in the middle that simply says "Vote for ____ . " Each week, the authors of the pamphlet fill in a variety of topics to vote for, ranging from the simple pleasures in life to hot-topic political concepts. This week's causes to vote for were amongst my favorites in the GOOD pamphlet series:

Vote for ___________.
Knowledge.
Choice.
Sweets.
The unexpected.
3 day weekends.
Thoughts.
Life.
Bridging the gap.
Kids.
Hipsters.
The best.
Inspiration.
Balance.
Equal access.
Music.
Happy hour.
Yourself.
Bicycling.
Freedom.
Good grammar.
Truth.
Everyone.

The question should no longer be, "Who are you voting for?" Maybe instead we should wonder what we are voting for.

Celebrate the Little Things.

2008-10-28T10:28:00.001-07:00

I've never been much of a "Peanuts" fan but this cartoon depiction of Snoopy and his little friends completely resonated with me. It's so easy to get bogged down in the grand complexities of life. It's natural to look too far into the future, attempting to predict what the greater scheme of your world is going to look like. It's almost impossible not to worry about the big obstacles we all inevitably encounter while on our life journey.

Yet I'm always reminded that focusing on the little blessings in life grounds us and refreshes us. I recently started a journal in which I write down the little things I'm thankful for every day. They include everything from Starbucks lattes and pumpkin-flavored desserts to funny text messages from friends and afternoons spent at the beach.

When we stop focusing on how busy we are, we allow ourselves to realize how many blessings God gives us every day. Sometimes He makes us laugh by providing us with the time to watch our favorite rerun of "The Office," or He lets us mourn by providing a friend to us when we need to vent the most. Sometimes He saves our wallets by giving us a waiter who treats us to a free dessert, or He makes us joyful by painting a beautiful sunset over the ocean. None of these things are coincidental; God is so intentional, handpicking each moment in which He chooses to bless us with the little things.

For a moment, then, I want to take the time to reflect on some of the little things that I've been blessed with in the past week that have truly enhanced my life. And I'll throw in some things that are constant pick-me-ups, treats that God gives me that I really don't deserve.

a weekend getaway. our office being closed on a random friday.
karli megan king. italian food. "yappy" hour.
pleasanton. hilariously and undeservingly acquiring celeb status.
youtube videos. belly-aching laughter. pumpkin muffins.
mexican food and margaritas. nicholas spence and his generosity.
more yappy hour.
breakfasting with friends. the truth of the cliche, "time flies when you're having fun." becca marie patterson, michael robert hoyt and jonathan david clark. frozen yogurt.
sausalito. exploring. art galleries, cafes and wine bars. the golden gate bridge and a breathtaking viewpoint.
trader joe's. homemade pizza. watching favorite shows.
starbucks. insanely random run-ins with long-lost friends. lunch after church.
erin marie chinen. $19 manicures and pedicures. OPI nailpolish.
mosaic, the mayan and wide awake.
family dinner. mexican pie and sangria. thomas bush, darnell brisco, dave pommer and matthew seth baker's rendition of "sue silver is my mom."
kristen grace hoffman. "stopping by" and staying too late because there's so much to catch up on.
chai tea. apartment five oh nine. cmpr. texts from friends. new car smell.
halloween packages from mrs. joyce. book club. the coffee bean on wilshire and 8th. english breakfast tea lattes. great conversation. new friends.
erin marie macdonald. jiraffe. lemon souffle. heart-to-hearts. red wine...especially the kind that benefits kids with autism, amongst other causes. actually, make that free red wine (thank you, kind waiter at jiraffe).
a comfy bed. a completely (finally) decorated room.
sweet dreams.

You, Only U.

2008-10-23T10:04:00.000-07:00

As promised, here's more video footage of Dave Barnes. Instead of showcasing his soulful crooning, this self-made YouTube video focuses on Dave's athletic ability as he attempts to create his own workout tutorial. Erin Mac, Sarah and I watched this video multiple times last night. And we cracked up each and every time. Enjoy.

My Mantra.

2008-10-20T16:09:00.000-07:00

:: If I'm not here, I'm at the beach. ::

After the Show, it's the After Party.

2008-10-20T15:03:00.000-07:00

On Thursday, I volunteered at the premiere of the documentary, "Down the Road." The film was a labor of love of one of my dearest friends, Joel Christensen. He, along with two others, traveled to Central America to film a documentary. They had no idea what they wanted to film; they simply departed with the goal of filming anything and everything, and hopefully returning to the States a few months later with a message to share.

The most powerful part of the documentary, to me, was the part the focused on La Chureca and the people who live there. La Chureca is exactly what this photo depicts: a trash dump. The people of this Nicaraguan "neighborhood" wait all day for the garbage trucks to arrive. When the trucks begin unloading the trash, the "citizens" of the dump scramble to collect items to eat, make clothes from and build their houses with. These humans live in this trash dump. Every single day, it is where they find their nourishment and shelter.

Joel and his traveling companions/fellow documentarians, Chris and Cody, were so moved by the people they met at La Chureca. They partnered with Brad Corrigan (formerly of Dispatch, currently of Braddigan), who started a non-profit organization called Love Light & Melody. His organization seeks to eliminate poverty, beginning with the eradication of the need for people to live amongst the trash in La Chureca. He started by saving young girls, many of whom were being taken from the trash dump and forced into prostitution. Joel, Chris and Cody were able to visit these girls and witness the impact Brad and Love Light & Melody have had on their lives.

Joel, Chris and Cody were able to help in Nicaragua by donating the car they had used on their Central American road trip (fondly nicknamed "La Tortuga," which is Spanish for "turtle," indicating its speed) to a sweet soul named Bismarck. This husband and father of two has worked every single day for six years in order to make ends meet. Bismarck not only spends his money on providing for his family but he uses it to better the lives of the street kids in La Chureca and Managua as well. He works as a chauffeur for the local Holiday Inn, and having his own car increased his profits by 60% (originally he had to give 60% of his earnings to the owner of the car he was using; now he can keep 80%, with the rest going to the Holiday Inn). The film showed that, one year later, Bismarck was using La Tortuga to get around town, to help his family and to save the children.

The film was amazing and I was so proud of Joel, Chris and Cody's efforts. Mike Miller was involved with the production of the film, and Eric Smith took fabulous photos and created an amazing Web site. It was fun to volunteer alongside Rose, Erin, Krystal, Christyn, Nick and Thomas. It felt great to support something that our loved ones have spent so much time creating. Almost 200 people came to Pepperdine's campus to watch the premiere. The evening was a huge success.

Afterwards, the film and volunteer crews headed to Duke's for an after party. Mom was in town, as previously mentioned, so it was so fun for me to introduce her to friends she'd heard about but never had the privilege of meeting. We all spent two hours snacking, drinking margaritas and laughing--a lot. At one point, while Nick and I were crammed onto the same chair at our lovely little table, we both paused and looked around at our beautiful group of friends and family. Nick commented on how happy it made him to see all of our busy selves joined together on a random Thursday night to celebrate the evening's success. I couldn't have agreed more. As I looked around the Barefoot Bar as things began to wind down (we were blissfully the only people there, considering we weren't competing with the Taco Tuesday crowd...and considering that the restaurant was technically closed...), I felt so blessed to be surrounded by so many wonderful, kind-hearted, passionate people.

Beach Cruising.

2008-10-17T14:33:00.000-07:00

I got a beautiful beach cruiser today as an early birthday present. I had saved for the bike for a few months and was all prepared to pay for it myself. Mom (she and Dad are in town for Pepperdine Family Weekend) went with me to Chubby's Cruisers in Culver City to pick out a bike. We finally selected this cruiser, the Bella model, in vanilla (a light yellow color...it is so pretty). When I went to pay at the register, Mom forced me to use her credit card, saying that the bike would be my early birthday present. I was thrilled, to say the least.

I can't wait to zoom around Santa Monica on my sweet new CRUISER.

The L.A. Song.

2008-10-16T13:21:00.000-07:00

Dave Barnes is one of my favorite artists. His music is relaxing, calming and consistent. Some of his lyrics are worship-based while others are mere observations of the joys and pains of everyday life. "Brother, Bring the Sun" was the first album of Dave's that I got into, and the lyrics of every song hit home with me. "Your Love Will Never Change" spoke to me about Christ's unconditional love for us while "Until You" reminded me that it's when we are not looking for a relationship that we find one. "Grace's Amazing Hands" seems to be a metaphor describing the way Jesus extends his forgiveness to us, though we don't deserve it; "On a Night Like This" is a romantic ballad about falling in love.

One of my favorite songs is probably one of the least discussed/analyzed/appreciated on this album. It's called "The L.A. Song" and I think it speaks so powerfully to the fact that women deserve the best in relationships, and that they shouldn't settle for anything less.

This video is from a concert Hunter, Greg and I went to in June at the Roxy on Sunset Boulevard. The concert was fabulous; when performing live, Dave sounds just like he does on his albums. He slowed this version of "The L.A. Song" down a little bit, which I loved. Please ignore the creep-o yelling, "Yeah, Dave!" and "Play it pretty for L.A.! Woo!" in the background. He eventually had to publicly reprimanded for his obnoxious behavior.

Coming soon: A video of Dave's antics/storytelling from the concert. (If you can't tell, I sort of love him a whole lot.)

I'm Only Good at Being Young.

2008-10-15T15:29:00.000-07:00

"Stop This Train" by John Mayer is my favorite song of all time. Its lyrics really resonate with me.

:: no, i'm not colorblind
i know the world is black and white
try to keep an open mind
but i just can't sleep tonight

stop this train
i wanna get off and go home again
i can't take the speed it's movin in
i know i can't
but honestly, won't someone stop this train?

don't know how else to say it
don't want to see my parents go
one generation's length away
from fighting life out on my own

stop this train
i wanna get off and go home again
i can't take the speed it's movin in
i know it can't
but honestly, won't someone stop this train?

so scared of getting older
i'm only good at being young
so i play the numbers game
to find a way to say that life has just begun

had a talk with my old man
said, help me understand
he said, turn 68
you'll renegotiate

don't stop this train
don't for a minute change the place you're in
and don't think i couldn't ever understand
i tried my hand
john, honestly, we'll never stop this train

once in awhile, when it's good
it'll feel like it should
and they're all still around
and you're still safe and sound
and you don't miss a thing
til you cry when you're driving away in the dark
singing

stop this train
i wanna get off and go home again
i can't take the speed it's movin in
i know i can
cause now i see i'll never stop this train ::

Johann von Goethe.

2008-10-15T13:24:00.001-07:00

:: Nothing is worth more than THIS DAY. ::

Johann van Goethe

Call + Response.

2008-10-15T09:27:00.000-07:00

On Monday, I got the chance to go see Call + Response, a documentary dedicated to exposing the truth about human trafficking. On the Web site, the following is written about the film:

:: Call + Response is a first of its kind feature documentary film that reveals the world's 27 million dirtiest secrets: there are more slaves today than ever before in human history. Call + Response goes deep undercover to where slavery is thriving from the child brothels of Cambodia to the slave brick kilns of rural India to reveal that in 2007, Slave Traders made more money than Google, Nike and Starbucks combined.

Luminaries on the issue such as Cornel West, Madeleine Albright, Daryl Hannah, Julia Ormond, Ashley Judd, Nicholas Kristof, and many other prominent political and cultural figures offer first hand accounts of this 21st century trade. Performances from Grammy-winning and critically acclaimed artists including Moby, Natasha Bedingfield, Cold War Kids, Matisyahu, Imogen Heap, Talib Kweli, Five For Fighting, Switchfoot, members of Nickel Creek and Tom Petty's Heartbreakers and Rocco Deluca move this chilling information into inspiration for stopping it.

Music is part of the movement against human slavery. Dr. Cornel West connects the music of the American slave fields to the popular music we listen to today, and offers this connection as a rallying cry for the modern abolitionist movement currently brewing. ::

The film is also known as a "rockumentary" because it focuses on the use of music to convey the issues to viewers. Clips of interviews and footage were interspersed with musical performances.

The proceeds from DVD sales, movie tickets and iTunes purchases, amongst other methods of sales, go to projects to eradicate the world of human slavery. The creators of the film want to involve the community in order to not only spread the word of this problem but also to allow viewers to know that they have become part of the solution.

The film touched my heart for a number of reasons. Unrelated to the movie was the fact that my darling best friend, Karli Megan King, had been tirelessly serving the C+R staff as an intern in their Oakland office for the past few months. It is so cool that she got to be a part of something this life-changing. As far as the film goes, it was obviously moving because the images of children and innocent men and women being trafficked to make some wealthy, lazy businessman a profit are horrifying. But I was most struck by the scene that focused on the slave trade that occurs on Lake Volta in northern Ghana. Pam, Randy and the other volunteers for Touch a Life Foundation (who I went to Ghana with) rescue children off of this man-made lake and take them to the Village of Hope Orphanage for rehabilitation, education and proper health care. Because the body of water is man-made, there are trees rooted at the bottom of the lake, and fishing nets frequently get stuck on the branches hidden underwater. Slave children (who were most likely sold to their masters by their parents) are forced to dive into the freezing water without wet suits to untangle the nets. One of the boys I met at the the Village of Hope, Famous, was forced to go underwater and when he reached the net, he accidentally touched an electric eel and was shocked. When he resurfaced, he was terrified, in pain and had forgotten the net. His master told him, bluntly, to shut up and go back under the water, that he couldn't come up for air until he had untangled the net and allowed for the fishing to proceed. Famous was five years old.

The film was undeniably difficult to watch but it was also incredibly inspiring. One of the interviewees made a really great point: Initially, society is in a state of obliviousness, not knowing about the problems that exist in the world. When society is informed of certain problems, including human trafficking, most people fall into a world of despair, feeling that the issue is too big for them to eradicate.

I know for a fact that the latter is not true. No matter how significant and overwhelming a problem may appear, we have the power to change the world. The C+R Web site lists a variety of ways that you can get involved in improving the world we live in:

Tell others. Expose the truth about modern-day slavery. Make sure everyone knows the 27 million dirtiest secrets.
Invest in change. Support those on the front lines and enable them to make a difference. Help fund the most effective projects to reduce slavery and care for its victims.
Join the network. Connect with other abolitionists in your area and with organizations addressing the issue.
Consume wisely. Hold businesses accountable and ask corporations to join the fight. Email companies to ensure that their products are slave-free.
Volunteer. Volunteer with a local anti-trafficking organization.
Watch. Keep an eye out and don’t turn away. If you suspect slavery or exploitation, call the national trafficking hotline: 888-3737-888.
Text. Text RESPOND to 90999 to donate $5 to a project.
Write. Submit an op-ed. Encourage newspapers, magazines and television stations to publish or to write stories about modern-day slavery, and how to stop it.
Map it. Document slavery in your area.
Tourism matters. Visit the Trafficking In Persons Report from the State Department. Find out which countries are the worst trafficking offenders. Write a letter to their travel bureau and tell them you won’t visit the country until they address the issue.
Purchase. Buying products made by survivors helps ensure their self-sufficiency.
Make help available. Place coasters at bars and sleeves for coffee cups to promote the hotline (888-3737-888). In public places, disseminate posters, brochures and other materials about trafficking.
Organize. Organize your community to address the issue in your area.
Advocate for change. Call or write your elected officials. Tell them that you care about the issue of human trafficking and want stronger laws to protect victims. Keep telling them.
Give healthcare. Help collect and pack medical supplies and equipment to be sent to shelters for survivors.
Walk. Global March has freed over 60,000 slaves in India. Their marches promote education for children instead of forced labor and exploitation.
Cybervention. Make sure trafficking does not happen on the internet. Keep an eye on Craigslist and advertising spaces.
Fight sex tourism. Ask travel agencies, hotels and tour operators to sign the Code of Conduct for the Protection of Children in Travel and Tourism.
Learn more. Continually update yourself on the issues at hand.
Prepare caretakers. Encourage healthcare providers and law enforcement officials to be aware of the signs of human trafficking.
Rescue victims. Pressure for raids of forced labor and slavery situations.
Do good business. Consult for anti-trafficking non-profits. Hire survivors of slavery. Ensure fair labor.
Go. Volunteer with organizations caring for survivors. Help build shelters. Teach English. Provide skills training. Ask the organization how you can help.
Assist victims. Volunteer at a local shelter for survivors. Help survivors access medical care and counseling, legal services, housing, a new job and companionship. Do a drive for supplies and donations to care for child victims of slavery.
Slave-free campuses. Start a group at your school or university, and make sure your campus is free of products made with slave labor.
Safeguard transportation. Ask airlines to provide training manuals to all their flight attendants on how to watch for victims being trafficked.
Motivate others. Post the Call+Response trailer on your Facebook pages. Join the cause. Join the causes of other organizations. Encourage your friends to do the same.
Love freedom. Give all you would spend on Valentine’s Day to buy freedom for slaves and to care for its victims.Tell those you love that you want them do the same.
Remember the facts. Memorize the statistics about child and sex slavery. Tell people.
Faith, schools and freedom. Help your faith community or school become an Abolitionist Organization.
Spread the word. Download posters from the C+R website and hang them in town and at school. Email to all your friends, family & coworkers the website link.
Get insights from the UN. Research the UN's discussions regarding human trafficking.
Do what you love. Use your talents to fight slavery. Do an art project and display it in a public place. Use a sports event to raise awareness and funds for the issue. Talk about the issue at a concert, or make it a benefit for survivors. Film a movie on the state of modern-day slavery. Write about the issue and post it on blogs.

The final suggestion is my favorite on the list. Use your passions, talents and gifts to support a cause. For me, Call + Response, Touch a Life and St. Jude Children's Research Hospital are three causes that I am devoted to supporting. My life changed by getting involved with these causes, and I want to use my skills and talents to better the world in these specific areas. For you, other causes might tug on your heartstrings. It doesn't matter what you support; just stand for something.

Londonsick.

2008-10-14T14:22:00.000-07:00

:: When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford. ::

Samuel Johnson

Lifehouse.

2008-10-13T15:49:00.001-07:00

Lifehouse's new song, "Broken," comes on all the time at work and I was just now struck by the lyrics in the chorus:

:: i'm falling apart
i'm barely breathing
with a broken heart
that's still beating
in the pain
there is healing
in your name
i find meaning
so i'm holding on
i'm barely holding on to you ::

The lyrics are, to me, so clearly about Jesus, about finding life's meaning and purpose in His name. I think it's so interesting that a song like this has permeated mainstream society, indicating that all of us are searching for Christ, whether we know it or not.

13.1.

2008-10-13T14:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I ran in the Long Beach Half Marathon. I definitely wouldn't go as far as saying that it was easy but it was absolutely way more enjoyable than I expected it to be. I couldn't believe it when I hit 10 miles; I felt as if I had only run two. The route was beautiful. At first it was somewhat industrial but the last half of the race was all along the beach, which was incredible. The weather was perfect--the sun was shining and the air was fresh. The last .1 of a mile was downhill, which was so fun. I sprinted down the last stretch, passing people and leaving them in my wake. All while listening to Love Lockdown, an awesome pump-up song with a crazy good beat (and a crazy good video, too).

All in all, the experience was so much fun. Running the race was truly a blast. Training for the half marathon was a blessing in disguise. It was obviously difficult and stressful at times (not to mention tiring) but it was also a great way for me to explore my new surroundings and to remember to put life into perspective. Though I've lived near Santa Monica for the past four years, I had never really explored the town. Since I had to run for hours at a time, I got to explore regions of Santa Monica I'd never checked out before, areas like Montana Avenue, Main Street and nooks and crannies of the beach. I really got familiar with my new neighborhood, which I loved.

Training was also important to me because I began to see running as therapy. Whenever I got frustrated with my job search, my dad would always tell me to keep exercising. Though it was simple advice, it was truly profound. I've always heard about the research linking exercise to the release of endorphins and I am a living testament to the truth of that statement. Mornings are usually the hardest for me when I'm stressed about something, so shaking off those nerves by going on a run was incredibly beneficial for me. It started my day off right and really cleared my mind. So thanks for that, Dad.

You don't have to train for a half marathon to get those endorphins going. Even a simple walk around the block, a pick-up football game or a bike ride will do the trick. Not only will your body thank you for the physical activity, but your psyche/emotional well-being will thank you, too.

Judy Grimes Does it Again.

2008-10-11T00:44:00.000-07:00

Many people will find this video creepy. I, however, can legitimately say that it has changed my life. Kim showed me this video tonight because she knows how much I love Judy Grimes. Judy is back at it but in a brand new role.

I have not laughed this hard in a long time...I literally laughed so hard that I cried. And then I watched the video six more times.

Judy Grimes.

2008-10-10T14:47:00.000-07:00

Besides anything Will Ferrell participated in on Saturday Night Live, this broadcast by travel writer Judy Grimes is by far my favorite skit on the popular improv show.

George MacDonald.

2008-10-09T23:45:00.000-07:00

In middle school, my fellow students and I had to collect a collaboration of poems and analyze them. As a teenager who loved reading and writing, this assignment was a perfect challenge for me. Interpreting poetry is so different from studying literature because it forces us to stretch our minds and comprehend concepts in a different light. Recently, as I was cleaning out my closet, I found the poems I had chosen to study. This one by George MacDonald struck me because the last line is so hopeful and powerful.

:: Sometimes a thunderbolt will shoot from a clear sky; and sometimes, into the midst of a peaceful family - without warning of gathered storm above or slightest tremble of earthquake beneath - will fall a terrible fact, and from that moment everything is changed. The air is thick with cloud, and cannot weep itself clear.

There may come a gorgeous sunset, though. ::

Children's Art Village.

2008-10-01T15:03:00.000-07:00

For this post, I just wanted to share a documentary that Patrick Cone (of C1 Productions) made while we were in Ghana in August. It is fantastic and makes me want to return to the Village of Hope tomorrow.

Under the Bridge.

2008-09-23T19:18:00.001-07:00

For work, I have to read Anthony Kiedis's autobiography, Scar Tissue. Kiedis is the lead singer for the Red Hot Chili Peppers and his life is insane, to put it mildly. His troubles started in his youth. His father wasn't much of a role model when Anthony was young; rather, he was his own personal drug dealer. Kiedis's life was full of drugs, sex and incessant partying. But at the core, what really held him together, was the power of music. Creating music was what saved Kiedis's life. Because of his dedication to his band, he eventually went to rehab to pull himself together.

There was a point in time when Kiedis (who was notorious for showing up to rehearsals and performances drunk and high) was the only one in the band who was sober. He felt like a buzzkill when around his fellow bandmates, and he began to experience intense feelings of loneliness. Those emotions, coupled with his regret for many of his mistakes made in the past, caused him to find solace in the city of Los Angeles.

On page 265, Kiedis writes: "...I also felt an unspoken bond between me and my city. I'd spent so much time wandering the streets of L.A. and hiking through the Hollywood Hills that I sensed there was a nonhuman entity, maybe the spirit of hills and the city, who had me in her sights and was looking after me. Even if I was a loner in my own band, at least I still felt the presence of the city I lived in."

Obviously, Kiedis and I had different childhoods and upbringings but his sentiments go to show that everyone experiences loneliness at one point or another, regardless of how much success surrounds them. It was so interesting to have stumbled across this passage after I had just written that entry about community and loneliness last night.

After writing about how he felt comforted by L.A., Kiedis wrote a poem that eventually turned into the hit song, "Under the Bridge." While my heart can't resonate with the drug-related lyrics in this song, there are some things that I can personally understand, especially about how a city can sometimes take on human-like characteristics to make you feel a little less alone:

:: sometimes i feel like i don't have a partner
sometimes i feel like my only friend
is the city i live in, the city of angels
lonely as i am, together we cry.

i drive on her streets 'cause she's my companion
i walk through her hills 'cause she knows who i am
she sees my good deeds and she kisses me windy
i never worry, now that is a lie.

i don't ever want to feel like i did that day
take me to the place i love, take me all the way
it's hard to believe that there's nobody out there
it's hard to believe that i'm all alone
at least i have her love, the city she loves me
lonely as i am, together we cry.

i don't ever want to feel like i did that day
take me to the place i love, take me all the way. ::

Fortunately, I've never felt like "there's nobody out there," but I can relate to the emotion of feeling comforted by the surroundings that have started to feel like home.

The Necessity of Community.

2008-09-22T21:54:00.000-07:00

For awhile after graduation, I considered moving to London. I studied abroad there twice and fell in love with the city. I could imagine myself living there and I actually still can picture myself moving there someday. I was very seriously contemplating the move, even going as far as writing down the pros and cons of the decision, contacting former internship employers and seeking advice from friends who had already moved there.

Though my list of pros was long and I'm a young, unattached woman with the world at her fingertips, my heart was telling me to stick around the U.S. for a little longer. Specifically, I felt as though things were falling into place for me to stay in California because of the community I've developed here. I have a specific attachment to southern California, especially Malibu. Moving out to the West Coast for college was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. My first semester at Pepperdine was defined by homesickness and loneliness. Though I made great friends (many of whom are still my best friends today), joined a sorority, plugged into a church and was accepted into an overseas program, I was constantly missing my family and my life in Wheaton. I knew there was a reason that I was 3,000 miles from home but I couldn't recall what it was.

Something changed when I got back from Christmas break and thoughts of transferring to Northwestern University (a mere 40 miles from Wheaton) disappeared. The only explanation for that peace was God. There really was nothing in my daily life that had changed; rather, I just felt like being at Pepperdine was right. After that, I never looked back. I fell in love with Malibu and my Pepperdine experience and I truly never wanted to leave.

Fast forward four years. Leaving Malibu was not something I wanted to do. So I didn't. I spent an amazing transitionary summer, living with four amazing women in a hilarious trailer park (not your typical trailer park...some of those things cost hundreds of thousands of dollars) overlooking the beach. It was the perfect balance for me because I didn't have to leave Malibu right away but I wasn't surrounded by my best friends anymore. I still had a community of friends that I'd met at Pepperdine but I was slowly learning how to cope without my favorites surrounding me on a daily basis.

Enter my move to Santa Monica. In July, I made a commitment to live with two incredible friends in an apartment on Colorado Avenue. I was so excited to move and we found a fantastic place, conveniently located five floors above a Starbucks. I was so happy to be moving into a "grown-up" space. I went to Ghana and came back to the excitement of moving in. I was on a high from my trip and my excitement was boosted by the busyness I encountered when trying to complete all of my moving tasks while back in Santa Monica.

And then reality set in. The reality that I was still fervently searching for a job, that my roommates were busy with their own jobs and graduate school, that the rest of my friends had graduated and moved away or were also working and that my friends still at Pepperdine had started classes and had resumed their lives on campus. And suddenly I felt very alone.

I had heard that many young adults my age were experiencing the same emotions as me but I couldn't believe it. Surely those friends of mine who had moved to different cities or who had already found jobs or who were getting engaged were not struggling with the same feelings as me. Surely they were happy and normal and fine. Surely I was the only one feeling that way.

It wasn't until I could be honest and vulnerable with others that I realized that while peoples' lives may look fabulous and peaceful on paper, that doesn't mean that they actually are. Everyone my age seems to be going through some sort of identity crisis, whether it's that they're struggling with a relationship, the difficulty of a new job or adjusting to a new hometown. I realized that I was really beating myself up emotionally. I constantly berated myself for not realizing how blessed I am. I have loving parents who are devoted to supporting me, roommates who care so much for me, a beautiful apartment to reside in, job opportunities that are on the brink of resulting in something great and a town that I am free to explore whenever I please. I looked at those things and got mad at myself for feeling lonely; I felt that I was being ungrateful for the gifts God had given me.

A wiser, older friend set me straight, though, telling me that it's okay to feel. Just because things appear perfect from the outside doesn't mean that they're great on the inside. Rather, we need to surround ourselves with people who lift our spirits when we can't do it ourselves. While I always knew that community was important, I didn't really get it until I experienced these new feelings of loneliness. Technology has thankfully made my world smaller, allowing me to keep in touch with those who aren't my neighbors or roommates anymore. God has placed a variety of people in my life here in Santa Monica, ranging from my best friends in the world to acquaintences I'd made at Pepperdine who can and may become treasured friends. He's allowed for random lunch dates, random phone calls and random run-ins that have boosted my morale. He's provided me with two mentors who aid me in the job search and one mentor who allows me to vent and who guides me emotionally. He's shown that He can appear to us in humanly form when we need comfort and community the most. He gives us friendships and relationships when He knows our hearts are aching from the pain of loneliness.

And sometimes He doesn't because He's asking us to cleave our hearts to His. In the silence, loneliness and pain, He wants us to turn to Him. He'll provide community to boost us at our lowest points and He'll remove it when He's asking us to take a leap of faith and trust in Him.

I am so thankful for my family and friends. I'm not sure where I would be right now without them. God has truly allowed so many new relationships to blossom in order to show His love and affection for me. Though He's had those times with me, where He's removed my community so I must seek Him out, God's showing compassion in this wild time by opening new doors for friendships and relationships for me. People I never thought I'd grow close to have shown interest in me and have pursued friendships with me. People I've always counted on have continuously shown their unconditional love for me, proving that God gave me those friendships for a reason.

I hope the people in my life know what they mean to me. I would most likely cease to exist without the community God's provided for me. This transition in life is wacky but God has used the people I've met, known and loved to allow me to rest assured that it's all gonna be all right.

Ghana.

2008-08-25T04:23:00.001-07:00

There is so much to say about my amazing service trip to Ghana. I can't sum it up into words properly so instead of trying, I'll just share one of my journal entries to give a bit of insight about my time in Africa. It's from Wednesday, August 20:

"I think my life changed a little bit today. I got to spend all afternoon and almost the entire evening with Pam and I am just so inspired by her story. She is just so logical and level-headed yet so ambitious, spontaneous and brave. She is amazingly strong (like Mom--they remind me of each other in a lot of ways) and amazingly fun. Pam motivates me to be my best self. I want to be more giving, more selfless and more ambitious because of her.

Randy, Rachael and Patrick came back from Kete-Kratchi, where the Ghanaian children (21 of whom now reside at the Village of Hope) who are child slaves live and are forced to work. The pictures Randy took were so hard to see. Especially a photograph of a 3-year-old child slave working on a fishing boat, shivering, freezing, starving and sick. It was a horrifying image; though it was terrifying, I couldn't tear my eyes away from it. It totally caused a stirring in my heart, tugging on these emotional strings I'd forgotten I had. It made me want to jump out of my seat and rescue that little boy--and 1,000 others, too.

Amongst the former child slaves at the Village of Hope are Famous (who is always mischievously smiling--I never would have known), Mark (the poster child for the rescue missions; he was the first saved off of the lake), Ezekiel and Sakora. I hate thinking of them being forced to work. I can't picture it but then I can...and when I do imagine it, I want to trade lives with them so those sweet boys never had to experience that pain and brutality. I can't wait to hug them tomorrow, to let them know how special they are.

Our impromptu trip to Accra this afternoon/evening (to shop/accompany Emily to the airport/attempt to pick up Patrick's luggage) was a blessing in so many ways. I loved spending time with Pam, Tatum, Susan, Jill, Ivy, Emily and Justice. I loved further exploring the Ghanaian culture in the market. I loved recapping the night with Mom, Susan and Chantilly. As hard and challenging as this trip has sometimes been, I am in love with it.

Only two days left. I'm going to cherish every minute."

Ecclesiastes 3:11.

2008-08-14T20:59:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time, back when I was in college (okay, so that was only about four months ago but it feels like eons ago), I was selected to speak at Senior Chapel. I needed to deliver a lighthearted speech about graduation and the future. The speech had to possess an air of nostalgia while simultaneously serving to inspire and encourage my fellow students.

I went through a rough break up in January and Ecclesiastes 3:11 really comforted me. The verse reads: "He has made everything beautiful in its time." I was so encouraged by those words because they reminded me that life is meant to be rough sometimes; without us knowing it, God is paving the way for something more incredible than we ever could have imagined. When I began to contemplate graduating from Pepperdine, again Ecclesiastes 3:11 inspired me. While beginning to look for jobs and thinking about the "real world," Ecclesiastes 3:11 repeated in my head and supported me. So what could be better than passing on that wisdom, comfort and encouragement to my friends as we took a leap and moved past our fabulous Pepperdine experiences?

Throughout this beautiful summer, Ecclesiastes 3:11 has served as my spiritual rock. Life has been completely unpredictable but everything always works out as it should. Worrying is pointless because I am learning that God is going to give me His best when it is ready. If it's not happening yet, it's because it's not as beautiful as it should be. A perfect example is my upcoming (and by upcoming, I mean in 9 hours) trip to Ghana. I have always dreamt of serving in Africa. I applied to the new Pepperdine summer program in Uganda and was not accepted. I was admitted to the program in April but it was too late for me to financially commit to such an opportunity. I pursued another opportunity in Kenya but the door was closed. When I learned of the Ghana trip, I pledged to myself that I'd make it there. There were a number of obstacles in the way--namely, my dad's hesitation in allowing me to go, as well as the interruption it could be in my job search--but God was so faithful. He definitely made me wait, cultivating patience in my life. I'm not really great at the whole patience game but God kept telling me to be still. The idea of participating in the trip entered my mom's mind and after further contemplation, she decided to go. This was not only a huge deal for her but it sealed the deal for me as well.

So now, not only do I get to fulfill my dream of traveling to and serving in Africa, but I get to do it with my beautiful mom. What a once in a lifetime opportunity. My Pepperdine friends, Susan and Chantilly, will also be going and I am thrilled to deepen my relationships with them. Pam Cope, an amazing humanitarian who rescues child slaves, will be on the trip as well. Mai Lai, the director of The Children's Art Village, did a fantastic job planning the trip and I am so excited to get to know her better, too.

God truly proved that things will be made beautiful in His time. We can't predict the future; frankly, we shouldn't even try. Our wildest dreams will only be expanded upon if we let God do His thing. He knows what's best for us and He knows that he can do more than we could ever imagine. It's easier said than done to trust Him--believe me, I was a stress case about this Ghana trip for a long time--but it's probably the most important and worthwhile thing we could ever do. Without His guidance, I could have forced my way on a trip to Africa that, though it would have undoubtedly been life-changing, would not be as incredible or as perfectly orchestrated as my trip to Ghana surely will be.

With that said, here's the lyrics to my favorite Shane and Shane song, called "Waiting Room." This song could not fit more perfectly with the Ecclesiastes 3:11 theme. Waiting on the Lord is hard (sometimes nearly impossible for me) but it proves to be the most important way to learn that God has truly made each aspect of life beautiful in its time:

:: i will run when i cannot walk
i will sing when there is no song
i will pray when there is no prayer
i will listen when i cannot hear

sitting in the waiting room of silence
waiting for that still soft voice i know
offering my words up to the rooftop to Your heart
trusting that this closet's where You are

Lord i know if i change my mind
You will change my heart in time
Sovereign Lord this time's from You
so i sit in the waiting room of silence
cause its all about You

i will fight when i cannot feel
i will trust when You dont seem real
i will tell when i cannot speak
i will step when i cannot see

Lord i know if i change my mind
You will change my heart in time
Sovereign Lord this time's from You
so i sit in the waiting room of silence
cause its all about You ::

Through Painted Deserts.

2008-07-08T16:13:00.000-07:00

In the fall of 2005, I went to the college group at Bel Air Presbyterian Church to see Donald Miller do a book reading. He was highlighting passages from his newest release, a memoir titled Through Painted Deserts. Though he only read bits and pieces from the foreword, I knew instantly that I had found my new favorite book. Miller's candid style of writing is so appealing to me. I always find myself able to relate to the things he writes. His words challenge me and don't limit me. I don't ever feel as though Miller is preaching to me; instead, his words read like advice from a wise, comforting friend.

This blog's title, then, serves to pay homage to my favorite book. Not only does it represent my love for Miller's underrated work (as good as Blue Like Jazz is, it's popularity trumps the amazing stuff in Through Painted Deserts) but it also is indicative of the point I'm at in my life. This is, to be frank, the weirdest time of my life. Don't get me wrong--I am happy and healthy and blessed. But graduating from college really rocked my world. I never really know how I feel in a given moment. One minute I'm thrilled about the prospects that life has to offer; the next, I'm terrified of moving past my Pepperdine experience and the memories made with friends. But Miller's words from the very same foreword he read aloud at Bel Air Pres on that crisp California evening in 2005 resonate with my emotions during this tumultuous time (providing yet another reason for me to name my blog after his book):

:: It might be time for you to go. It might be time to change, to shine out. I want to repeat one word for you: Leave. Roll the word around on your tongue for a bit. It is a beautiful word, isn't it? So strong and forceful, the way you have always wanted to be. And you will not be alone. You have never been alone. Don't worry. Everything will still be here when you get back. It is you who will have changed. ::

He's right. Life is crazy and, to be honest, sometimes a mess. But it is so beautiful. Though we sometimes get lost and confused along the way, we know we're journeying alongside a God who loves us the most, family members who cherish our lives and friends who build us up. Life is all about trekking through painted deserts; it's going to be tough at times but it's going to be so dang beautiful, too.

One last thing about my favorite read and then I'll keep quiet about it (for now): the book wasn't actually published until five years (give or take) after it was written. Miller originally intended for the book to be called Prayer and the Art of Volkswagen Maintenance (a spoof on the much more philosophical and serious work, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, by Robert Pirsig) but the publishers sent it back and asked for a rewrite. It wasn't until after his success with Blue Like Jazz that Miller got to give Through Painted Deserts another shot. On his Web site, he writes, "Through Painted Deserts will always be my favorite book. I think an author always likes his or her first book the best." Despite his setbacks, Miller knew what he wanted and ensured that his dreams materialized. He got stuck, had to try some different things for awhile and then was able to make his comeback. He left. He wasn't alone. And it was he who has changed.

I think I'll try that, too.