Under the Bridge.

For work, I have to read Anthony Kiedis's autobiography, Scar Tissue. Kiedis is the lead singer for the Red Hot Chili Peppers and his life is insane, to put it mildly. His troubles started in his youth. His father wasn't much of a role model when Anthony was young; rather, he was his own personal drug dealer. Kiedis's life was full of drugs, sex and incessant partying. But at the core, what really held him together, was the power of music. Creating music was what saved Kiedis's life. Because of his dedication to his band, he eventually went to rehab to pull himself together.

There was a point in time when Kiedis (who was notorious for showing up to rehearsals and performances drunk and high) was the only one in the band who was sober. He felt like a buzzkill when around his fellow bandmates, and he began to experience intense feelings of loneliness. Those emotions, coupled with his regret for many of his mistakes made in the past, caused him to find solace in the city of Los Angeles.

On page 265, Kiedis writes: "...I also felt an unspoken bond between me and my city. I'd spent so much time wandering the streets of L.A. and hiking through the Hollywood Hills that I sensed there was a nonhuman entity, maybe the spirit of hills and the city, who had me in her sights and was looking after me. Even if I was a loner in my own band, at least I still felt the presence of the city I lived in."

Obviously, Kiedis and I had different childhoods and upbringings but his sentiments go to show that everyone experiences loneliness at one point or another, regardless of how much success surrounds them. It was so interesting to have stumbled across this passage after I had just written that entry about community and loneliness last night.

After writing about how he felt comforted by L.A., Kiedis wrote a poem that eventually turned into the hit song, "Under the Bridge." While my heart can't resonate with the drug-related lyrics in this song, there are some things that I can personally understand, especially about how a city can sometimes take on human-like characteristics to make you feel a little less alone:

:: sometimes i feel like i don't have a partner
sometimes i feel like my only friend
is the city i live in, the city of angels
lonely as i am, together we cry.

i drive on her streets 'cause she's my companion
i walk through her hills 'cause she knows who i am
she sees my good deeds and she kisses me windy
i never worry, now that is a lie.

i don't ever want to feel like i did that day
take me to the place i love, take me all the way
it's hard to believe that there's nobody out there
it's hard to believe that i'm all alone
at least i have her love, the city she loves me
lonely as i am, together we cry.

i don't ever want to feel like i did that day
take me to the place i love, take me all the way. ::

Fortunately, I've never felt like "there's nobody out there," but I can relate to the emotion of feeling comforted by the surroundings that have started to feel like home.